


The Loserz Club

by softboystanley



Category: IT (2017)
Genre: Multi, bev is the mom friend, eventual benverly - Freeform, eventual reddie, eventual stenbrough, gets really angsty cause thats what yall wanted, mike is ace / aro cause why not, oof its a gc fic no one asked for, possibly avengers iw spoilers later on, so many memes, sonia is here and ready to be a bitch, sorry - Freeform, stan gets most of it, this is just some filler shit imma do every now and again while i work on stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-19
Updated: 2019-02-14
Packaged: 2019-08-04 06:25:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 44
Words: 26,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16341527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softboystanley/pseuds/softboystanley
Summary: [trashy] do yall ever realize that w is said like ‘double u’[eddo spaghetto] shut the fuck up and go to sleep





	1. The Time When Richie Said Rawr

**Author's Note:**

> okay so this is just some random ass fluff im doing whilst i work on my byler fic that gonna come out on saturday
> 
> also richie put the z in loserz 
> 
>  
> 
> bill - buckaroo bill  
> stan- stanny the manny  
> eddie - eddo spaghetto  
> richie- trashy  
> bev - jesus  
> mike - farm boy  
> ben - softy

_ [ the loserz club]  _

 

_ [11:46pm]  _

  
  


_ [trashy] do yall ever realize that w is said like ‘double u’  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] shut the fuck up and go to sleep  _

 

_ [softy] wait a minute  _

 

_ [softy] ur right  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] richie are u high  _

 

_ [trashy] nope not yet  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] key word yet  _

 

_ [trashy] …..  _

 

_ [trashy] wow billiam  _

 

_ [jesus] if yall wake up mike imma murder  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] yes let the sleepy boy rest  _

 

_ [trashy] but  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] l e t h i m r e s t  _

  
  
  


_ [9:23 am]  _

 

_ [farm boy] wow you guys  _

 

_ [farm boy] im so proud  _

 

_ [farm boy] you went to sleep at an acceptable time  _

 

_ [trashy] i know it was weird  _

 

_ [trashy] i feel so  _

 

_ [trashy] alive  _

 

_ [trashy] is this how u feel all the time mikey  _

 

_ [farm boy] yes  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] whats the most 2012 emo phrase ever  _

 

_ [trashy] its not a phase  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] rawr xd  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] how dare you make me read that with my own two eyes  _

 

_ [jesus] rawr is how dinos say i love you  _

 

_ [softy] thats so cursed  _

 

_ [trashy] eds rawr XD _

 

_ [stanny the manny] i regret everything  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] beep beep  _

  
  


_                               [bitchie bill] - [dumbass]  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] subtle  _

 

_ [dumbass] fuck off bill at least im not quietly pinning over stan  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i have no idea what you mean  _

  
  
  


_                                   [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [softy] whos house for movie night  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] we can do mine  _

 

_ [bukaroo bill] as long as your all chill with georgie hanging with us  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] ofc  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] *you’re  _

 

_ [trashy] grammar police have enered the chat  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] *entered  _

 

_ [trashy] i hate you  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] the feelings mutual  _

 

_ [trashy] oof stanny babe im offended i thought you loved me  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] now where in the world did you get the impression  _

 

_ [jesus] damn stan get em  _

 

_ [farm boy] god has left the chat  _

 

_ [trashy] nice meme reference mikey  _

 

_ [farm boy] thanks  _

  
  
  



	2. The Time When Stan Almost Committed Murder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof so i didnt mention this earlier but updates for this are going to be irregular sorry in advanced if theres any huge gaps between chapters

_    [the loserz club]  _

  
  


_ [2:13pm]  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] i really hate the z in the name of this chat  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] it has such a negative energy  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] i really does _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] sends a shiver up my spine  _

 

_ [jesus] its like an ad for old navy from 2007  _

 

_ [softy] who even put the z there  _

_ [farm boy] i dont remember a time without it  _

 

_ [trashy] i see yhall are talking about my genius chat name  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] wtf is yhall  _

 

_ [jesus] if your gonna use yall use it right bich  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] *bitch  _

 

_ [jesus] not the time stan  _

 

_ [trashy] stan more like satan am i right  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] that is the 5 time today youve made that joke  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] and never once was it funny _

 

_ [trashy] oof billy boy i am hurt  _

 

_ [softy] never use oof again  _

 

_ [farm boy] oof is so bad  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] its like when he used to call everyone bro  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] ew never speak of that  _

 

_ [jesus] he sounded like every straight football player ever  _

 

_ [softy] didnt he call stan bro and stan almost bitch slapped him  _

 

_ [trashy] THATS RIGHT HE DID  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] mike had to hold him back  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] i have no recollection of this event. _

 

_ [trashy] suuuuurrreee  _

  
  


_                                                [the loserz club]  _

_ [10:11am] _

_ [stanny the manny] someone better hold me back before i murder richie  _

 

_ [softy] whatd he do this time  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] drank milk straight from the container  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] NO  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] ultimate crime  _

 

_ [farm boy] please  _

 

_ [farm boy] end him  _

 

_ [trashy] woah woah  _

 

_ [trashy] i have so much to live for  _

 

_ [trashy] im too young to die  _

 

_ [jesus] do it  _

 

_ [trashy] bev nooo please  _

 

_ [jesus] d o i t  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] rich do you really think people want your gross ass mouth germs in their milk  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] think about my cereal  _

 

_ [trashy] i can think of a better place to put my mouth germs ;)  _

 

_ [jesus] EWWW  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] stan do it  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] imma do it  _

 

_ [softy] why did you make me read that  _

 

_ [farm boy] imma launch myself into the sun richie wtf was that  _

 

_ [jesus] eddo spaghetto has left the chat  _

_ [eddo spaghetto] beep beep loser  _

 

_ [trashy] exactly the reaction i wanted  _

 

_ [jesus] even worse  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] stan why is he not dead yet  _

 

_ [trashy] trust me hes trying  _

 

_ [trashy]   _ **_[standoinghisbest.jpg]_ **

 

_ [buckaroo bill] did you lock him outside your window _

 

_ [trashy] yes hes stuck on the tree its hilarious  _

 

_ [jesus] dont tempt him  _

 

_ [trashy] o shit hes going through the door  _

 

_ [trashy] hes off the tree and at my door _

 

_ [trashy] MY MOM LET HIM IN  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] haha my boy gonna get you  _

 

_ [jesus] r.i.p richard tozier  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] never in our hearts  _

 

_ [softy] damn eddie  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] i didnt kill him  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] i stole his phone  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] so much better  _

 

__

_                                                       [dumbass] - [bitchie bill]  _

 

_ [dumbass] are we not gonna talk about how you slipped up and called stan your boy earlier _

 

_ [bitchie bill] nope we aint  _

  
  
  


_                                                [bird boy] - [eddio]  _

 

_ [bird boy] AHHHHHHHH  _

 

_ [eddio] WHAT  _

 

_ [bird boy]  _ **_[billcallingstanhisboy.jpg]_ **

 

_ [bird boy] GAY YELLS  _ __  
  


_ [eddio] EVEN GAYER YELLS  _

 

_ [bird boy] but what if it means nothing i mean i cant get my hopes up  _

 

_ [eddio] or it could mean everything _

 

_ [bird boy] eddie im freaking out what do i do  _

 

_ [eddio] nothing  _

 

_ [eddio] let bill come to you  _

 

_ [bird boy] smart   _

  
  
  


_                                                      [the loserz club]  _

 

__ **_trashy changed the chat name to: the lozerz club_ **

 

_ [trashy] since yall loved it so much  _

 

_ [jesus] richie im actually gonna kill you in your sleep _

 

_ [stanny the manny] you best sleep with one eye open tonight bitch  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] you best change it back rich  _

 

_ [trashy] fine but only cause my spaghetti head requested it _

__

__ **_trashy changed the chat name to: the loserz club_ **

  
  
  


_ [eddo spaghetto] thank you  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] ill hold off on murder  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] for tonight that is  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] oooo spooky  _

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback is always appreciated! 
> 
> and please if youve got any ideas or requests for this let me know


	3. The Time When They Figured Out What To Watch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this entire chapter is just one interaction but i felt bad for not posting something 
> 
> and if you have any requests or ideas for things in this let me know cause i have no plan/plot whatsoever 
> 
> bro who can find my two not-so-subtle easter eggs

_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [11:34pm]  _

 

_ [farm boy] what are we watching at bills tmr  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] i got avengers iw on dvd  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] o shit eddie  _

 

_ [jesus] i dont know if im ready to face that again  _

 

_ [trashy] yeah and star lord is ruined for me  _

 

_ [stanny the manny] what did u just say  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] ruh ro  _

 

_ [trashy] star lord is ruined  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] STAR LORD DID NOTHING WRONG  _ __  
  


_ [stanney the manney] IMAGINE HAVING YOUR MOTHER DIE FROM CANCER THEN BEING KIDNAPPED BY SPACE THEIVES AND THEN FINDING OUT YOUR FATHER GAVE YOUR MOTHER AND HAVING TO KILL HIM THEN FINALLY FINDING HAPPINESS WITH GAMORA AND THEN HAVING HER RIPPED AWAY FROM YOU  _

 

_ [trashy] woah woah woah  _

 

_ [trashy] chill stan  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] i w i l l n o t  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] everyone knows  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] stan loves star lord  _

 

_ [softy] wait i didnt know that  _

 

_ [softy] stan you felt much more of a peter p guy  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] stan looks EXACTLY like the kid that played young star lord so hes always felt connected _

 

_ [farm boy] wait really  _

 

_ [stanney the manney]  _ **_[youngstanandyoungstarlord.jpg]_ **

 

_ [softy] SHIT HE REALLY DOES  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] how bout stand by me  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] damnit bill not again  _

 

_ [trashy] bill u say that every week  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] but but its gordie and chris and teddy and vern  _

 

_ [softy] bill you justed listed the characters that was not persuasive _

 

_ [stanney the mannney] idk man it persuaded me  _

 

_ [trashy] stan?? using?? abbrevations??   _

 

_ [stanney the manney] richie?? not?? spelling?? correctly??  _

 

_ [trashy] touche  _

 

_ [softy] but actually what should we watch  _

 

_ [jesus] HEATHERS  _

_ [jesus] PLEASEE  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] any objections to heathers  _

 

_ [trashy] nah  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] winona ryder is life so sure _

 

_ [softy] are we in argeement  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] ofc  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] mike?  _

 

_ [farm boy] go for it  _

 

_ [jesus] YAY  _

 

_ [trashy] wait what about georgie  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] georgie has his own sleepover happening  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] GASP  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] GEORGIES ALL GROWN UP NOW  _ __  
  


_ [jesus] he got friends his age  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] i feel forgotten???  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] hey guys  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] its georgie  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] hi georgie  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] hiya stan  _

 

_ [jesus] georgie i hear youve got your own sleepover tmr  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] ya i met some kids in my class and were all gonna go play d&d  _

 

_ [trashy] my cuz and his friends are obsessed with that game  _

_ [stanney the manney] maybe you could teach us to play sometime  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] thatd be super fun  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] anyway ive gotta go now  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] bye georgie  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] have fun at your sleepover  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] wazzup loserz  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] NO  _


	4. The Time When Richie and Bill Fucked Up, Hard

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof boyos this is a long one to make up for the last one 
> 
> i finally got a plot thanks to trashmouth_gal thank you so so much

_ [the losers club]  _

__

_                      [11:34am]  _

 

_ [trashy] uh mr. lenoards class is so fucking lame  _

 

_ [trashy] guuuuuyyysss  _

 

_ [trashy] im bored  _

 

_ [trashy] someone  _

 

_ [trashy] mikey  _

 

_ [trashy] benny boy  _

 

_ [trashy] bevvvv  _

 

_ [trashy] billiam  _

 

_ [trashy] staniel  _

 

_ [trashy] eds  _

 

_ [trashy] guuuuyys  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] RICHIE  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] you got bills phone taken by mrs. freeman _

 

_ [trashy] dumbass never turns his ringer off  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] says the dumbass whose spamming the gc cause hes bored  _

 

_ [trashy] ooo texting in class stanny?  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] im in the bathroom cause my phone was blowing up and i thought something was actually wrong  _

 

_ [softy] ive got a free period rn  _

 

_ [softy] i could keep you company  _

 

_ [trashy] BENNY TO THE RESCUE  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] rich pay attention to class  _

 

_ [trashy] but why  _

 

_ [trashy] when am i ever gonna need geometry in the real world  _

 

_ [trashy] plus i ace this class anyways  _

 

_ [softy] i never thought id hear richie describe geometry as an easy a  _

 

_ [trashy] ive turned my life around  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] yes richie were all very prou _

 

_ [trashy] eds?  _

 

_ [trashy] spaghetti boy?  _

 

_ [softy] maybe if you say his name loud enough he’ll come back  _

 

_ [trashy] EDS  _

 

_ [trashy] didnt work  _

 

_ [jesus] you got his phone taken dickhead  _

 

_ [trashy] they got eds  _

 

_ [trashy] i will avenge my love  _

 

_ [softy] and how are you gonna do that  _

 

_ [trashy] ….  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] my class ended early   _

 

_ [trashy] STANNYS HERE  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] i regret everything  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] and im walking by eddies class now _

 

_ [stanney the manney] bill and his phones are on the desk and theyre both not there  _

 

_ [trashy] oh no  _

 

_ [trashy] she killed them  _

 

_ [softy] theyre probably with the principal  _

 

_ [trashy] EVEN WORSE  _

 

_ [trashy] if eds goes to the principal and then his mom finds out shell never let him have his phone back  _

 

_ [trashy] how will i talk to my boy?  _

 

_ [softy] verbal conversations  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] lunch bell  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] theyre coming out of his office  _

 

_ [trashy] im running there  _

  
  
  
  


_                                                   [the losers club]  _

_ [12:13pm]  _

 

_ [farm boy] ive got a differnt lunch you guys  _

 

_ [farm boy] whats happening  _

 

_ [jesus] eddie and bill got detention for a week  _

 

_ [jesus] eddie isnt talking to richie  _

 

_ [jesus] richie depresso  _

 

_ [farm boy] what about bill  _

 

_ [jesus] bills fine  _

  
  
  


_ [eddio - bird boy]  _

 

_ [eddio]  _ **_[richiecallingeddiehislove.jpg]_ **

 

_ [bird boy]  _ **_[richiecallingeddiehisboy.jpg]_ **

 

_ [eddio] AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  _

 

_ [bird boy] YOUVE TO SAY SOMETHING  _

 

_ [eddio] but  _

 

_ [bird boy] but what just do it  _

 

_ [eddio] im mad at him  _

 

_ [bird boy] you clearly have your phone back and your moms not mad so why are you  _

 

_ [eddio] fiinne  _

  
  


_   [eds <3 - rich]  _

 

_ [eds<3] hey rich  _

 

_ [rich] yes my spaghetti  _

 

_ [eds<3]  _ **_[richiecallingeddiehislove.jpg]_ **

 

_ [eds<3] care to explain  _

 

_ [rich] oh  _

 

_ [rich] i was just being dramatic  _

 

_ [eds<3] oh ok  _

  
  


_ [eddio - bird boy]  _

 

_ [eddio]  _ **_[asadmistake.jpg]_ **

 

_ [bird boy] oh eddie  _

 

_ [bird boy] im sorry  _

 

_ [eddio] its fine im over it  _

 

_ [bird boy] do you want to talk _

 

_ [eddio] goodnight stan  _

  
  


_ [dumbass - bitchie bill]  _

 

_ [dumbass] i fucked up bill  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] what did you do  _

 

_ [dumbass]  _ **_[richiesmistake.jpg]_ **

 

_ [bitchie bill] fucks sake richie  _

 

_ [dumbass] what do i do  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] well he seems pretty sad  _

 

_ [dumbass] your his best friend text him or something _

 

_ [bitchie bill] here i go again cleaning up your messes  _

 

_ [dumbass] ill pay you back  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] you better  _

  
  


_ [billy - edDIE]  _

 

_ [billy] hey eddie how u doing  _

 

_ [edDIE] fine why  _

 

_ [billy] no reason just wanted to talk to my best friend  _

 

_ [edDIE] what do u want  _

 

_ [billy] why would you assume that i want something  _

 

_ [edDIE] because of the way your speaking  _

 

_ [billy] fine  _

 

_ [billy] i saw what happened with u and richie  _

 

_ [edDIE] how  _

 

_ [billy] richie  _

 

_ [edDIE] wait he was upset  _

 

_ [billy] he fucked up  _

 

_ [billy] he likes u ya know  _

 

_ [billy] he never shuts up about u  _

 

_ [edDIE] your fucking with me  _

 

_ [billy] nope  _

  
  


_ [eddio-bird boy]  _

  
  


_ [eddio] AHH STAN  _

 

_ [bird boy] oh so now youll talk to me _

 

_ [eddio] THIS IS NOT A DRILL  _

 

_ [eddio]  _ **_[billspillingthetea.jpg]_ **

 

_ [bird boy] omg omg omg omg  _

 

_ [bird boy] YOUVE GOT TO SAY SOMETHING THIS IS LEGIT  _

 

_ [eddio] WHAT ARE YOU CRAZY  _

 

_ [eddio] i just found out that my long time crush likes me back im not gonna jump into it  _

 

_ [bird boy] that is the stupidest thing but i respect your decision  _

 

_ [bird boy] if u wait too long tho ill get help  _

 

_ [eddio] ??  _

 

_ [bird boy] ill get bev  _

 

_ [eddio] o shit  _

 

_ [bird boy] im not playing around  _

 

__

 

_ [bitchie bill - dumbass]  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] okay so funny story…  _

 

_ [dumbass] oh no  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i may have accidentally told eddie you liked him  _

 

_ [dumbass] WHAT  _

  
  


_ [bitchie bill]  _ **_[bigbillsbigmistake.jpg]_ **

 

_ [dumbass] OH MY FUCKING GOD BILL  _

 

_ [dumbass] WHAT DO I DO  _

 

_ [dumbass] IM FREAKING OUT  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] hold that thought stans texting me  _

 

_ [dumbass] I DONT GIVE A SHIT THAT STAN IS TEXTING YOU THIS IS SERIOUS  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] brb  _

  
  


_ [beautiful boy - billiam]  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] cant believe you did that  _

 

_ [billiam] did what  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] told eddie richie likes him  _

 

_ [billiam] howd u find out  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] eddie  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] hes kinda freaking out  _

 

_ [billiam] richie is too  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] haha i guess its up to us to fix this mess  _

 

_ [billiam] guess so  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] you know who we need  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] bev  _

 

_ [stan - bill - bev]  _

 

_ [stan] bev we need your help  _

  
  


_ [bev] what did u two do now  _

 

_ [stan] eddie and richie like each other and bill accidentally told eddie that richie liked him and now there both freaking out  _

 

_ [bev] good lord  _

 

_ [bill] hey it wasn’t all my fault  _

 

_ [stan] dont lie to yourself  _

 

_ [bev] ill deal with them now u two later  _

 

_ [stan] we dont need to be dealt with?? _

 

_ [bev] sure  _


	5. The Time When They Got Together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> REDDIE!!! 
> 
> with a stenbrough ending cause thats my lane

_   [mom 2 - my gay son]  _

 

_ [mom 2] listen up  _

 

_ [mom 2] u like richie richie likes you  _

 

_ [mom 2] just talk to him  _

 

_ [mom 2] you two have been flirting with each other since the third grade  _

 

_ [my gay son] how do u know  _

 

_ [mom 2] stan n bill  _

 

_ [my gay son] bev  _

 

_ [my gay son] im scared  _

 

_ [mom 2] why  _

 

_ [my gay son] i dont know what if  _

 

_ [my gay son] what if its some elaborate joke or something and richie doesnt like me  _

 

_ [mom 2] impossible he loves you  _

 

_ [mom 2] everyone can see that  _

 

_ [my gay son] ok  _

 

_ [my gay son] imma do it  _

  
  
  


_                                                   [scary - a bi mistake]  _

 

_ [scary] get your shit together tozier  _

 

_ [a bi mistake] excuse me  _

 

_ [scary] eddie thinks your playing a prank on him  _

 

_ [scary] grow a pair and talk to him  _

 

_ [a bi mistake]DID BILL TELL EVERYONE  _

 

_ [scary] only u me eddie bill and stan know  _

 

_ [a bi mistake] so 5/7 of the club  _

 

_ [a bi mistake] thats just greaat  _

 

_ [scary] just fucking talk to him  _

  
  
  
  


_                                               [eds <3 - rich]  _

 

_ [eds<3] we need to talk  _

 

_ [rich] funny i was gonna say the same thing  _

 

_ [eds<3] i know that u like me  _

  
  
  


_ [eds<3] jesus it sounds like were in middle school  _

 

_ [rich] i guess it does  _

 

_ [rich] and i know that u like me  _

 

_ [eds<3] so now what?  _

 

_ [rich] well what do you want  _

 

_ [eds<3] can u just come over so we can talk about this in person  _

 

_ [rich] be there in 5  _

  
  


_                                          [stan- bill - bev - mike - ben]  _

 

_ [stan] ok so richie likes eddie eddie likes richie they both just found out and are about to talk in person  _

 

_ [mike] how do u know that _

 

_ [bill] i spilled the tea accidentally  _

 

_ [ben] oo whats happening now _

 

_ [stan] richies throwing rocks at eddies window  _

 

_ [stan] the window is opening  _

 

_ [stan] richies climbing the tree  _

 

_ [stan] hes in the house i cant see him anymore  _

 

_ [bev] when they tell us about their decision everybody act super surprised  _

 

_ [mike] ill practice my reaction rn  _

 

_ [mike] WHAA REALLY  _

 

_ [mike] I HAD NO IDEA  _

 

_ [bill] alright there bud tone down the sarcasm  _

 

_ [mike] great note _

 

_ [stan] RICHIES COMING BACK OUT  _

 

_ [stan] hes sticking his head out the window  _

 

_ [stan] hes looking at my window  _

 

_ [stan] hes got a sign _

 

_ [stan] you know what nvm  _

 

_ [ben] wait no whatd it say  _

 

_ [stan] i dont want to talk about it  _

 

_ [bill] pleeasse  _

 

_ [stan] fuck off stan  _

 

_ [bev] AHAHAHAHAHHAHA  _

  
  


_                                                                           [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] guys  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] rich and i have an announcement  _

 

_ [trashy] WE BANGED  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] no that wasnt it  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] we get the gist  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] awww it finally happened  _

 

_ [jesus] HA MIKE YOU OWE ME 30 BUCKS  _

 

_ [farm boy] damn yall couldnt have waited a day _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto]  you  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] you put a bet on when we were gonna get together _

 

_ [farm boy] no we put a bet on when you were gonna tell us  _

 

_ [jesus] stan n bill told us all about richie at your place  _

 

_ [trashy] WOW STAN AND BILL CANT KEEP THEIR MOUTHS SHUT HUH  _

 

_ [softy] im happy for you two :)  _

 

_ [jesus] aww ben is so soft  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] hence the name  _

 

_ [jesus] alright stan  _

  
  


_                                                             [big bill - mikey boy]  _

 

_ [big bill] mike i need your help  _

 

_ [big bill] i like stan  _

 

_ [mikey boy] what do u want me to do about it  _

 

_ [big bill] help?? me??  _

 

_ [mikey boy] with what  _

 

_ [big bill] telling him idk  _

 

_ [big bill] i feel like this is the kinda thing youd be good at  _

 

_ [mikey boy] you do realize im ace and aro right  _

 

_ [big bill] can i just come over tmr so we can have like a game plan  _

 

_ [mikey boy] i dont have a choice do i  _

 

_ [big bill] not really  _

  
  


_ [stan - soft boy ben]  _

 

_ [stan] your romantic right  _

 

_ [soft boy ben] one could say  _

 

_ [soft boy ben] why  _

 

_ [stan] i need your help  _

 

_ [soft boy ben] with what  _

 

_ [stan] getting bill to like me  _

 

_ [soft boy ben] awwwwwwwwww  _

 

_ [stan] shut up  _

 

_ [softy boy ben] sunflowers  _

 

_ [stan] what  _

 

_ [softy boy ben] get him sunflowers  _

 

_ [stan] thats  _

 

_ [stan] actually kinda cute  _

  
  



	6. The Time When Stan Was In The Sunflowers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this like is wholeheartedly my favorite chapter by far 
> 
> also if u catch my reference i will love u forever and ever cause its kinda obscure

_  [beautiful boy -billiam]  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] hey bill _

 

_ [beautiful boy] wanna hang out today  _

 

_ [billiam] im hanging out with mike 2day sorry  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] oh  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] thats fine  _

  
  
  


_                                                  [bird - farm]  _

 

_ [bird] what are u doing  _

 

_ [farm] what  _

 

_ [bird] with bill  _

 

_ [farm] jesus christ this is why i didnt wanna get involved  _

 

_ [bird] involved with what  _

 

_ [farm] you guys shit  _

 

_ [bird] we dont have shit  _

 

_ [farm] then why are u texting me to stay away from your man  _

 

_ [bird] touche  _

 

_ [farm] what is with u people and forgetting im aro _

 

_ [bird] sorry  _

 

_ [farm] its ok  _

 

_ [bird] side note _

 

_ [bird] do u know where to buy sunflowers _

 

_ [farm] ive got some at the farm  _

 

_ [bird] could i swing by today and grab some  _

 

_ [farm] lemme guess  _

 

_ [farm] if the exact same time bill is here  _

 

_ [bird] you know me so well  _

_ [farm] hes gonna be here at 11  _

 

_ [farm] sunflowers are by the sheep _

 

_ [bird] love ya mike  _

 

_ [farm] i know  _

  
  
  


_                                         [big bill - mikey boy]  _

 

_ [mkey boy] be here at 11  _

 

_ [big bill] you got it  _

  
  
  


_                                     [farm - bird]  _

 

_ [farm] get here in 15 min _

 

_ [bird] did u set something up  _

 

_ [farm] maybe….  _

 

_ [bird] id die for u mike  _

 

_ [farm] unnecessary  _

  
  
  


_                                  [bird - farm]  _

 

_ [bird] i grabbed a few  _

 

_ [bird] thanks mike  _

 

_ [farm] he was all like ‘omg is that stan’  _

 

_ [farm] and ‘damn hes so cute with the flowers’  _

 

_ [farm] o shit  _

 

_ [farm] i was not supposed to say that  _

 

_ [bird] AHJSJSHADJHDJJ  _

 

_ [bird] HE SAID THAT?!?!?!?! _

  
  
  


_                                              [bird boy - eddio]  _

  
  


_ [bird boy] GAYEST YELLS  _

 

_ [eddio] GAYER YELLS  _

 

_ [eddio] WHY ARE WE YELLING  _

 

_ [bird boy]  _ **_[cutestanandthesunflowers.jpg]_ **

 

_ [eddio] ANKDJNSDKJFSKHDKSHKJFSD _

 

_ [eddio] I AM GONE  _

 

_ [bird boy] HOW DO YOU THINK FEEL  _

  
  
  


_                                               [bitchie bill - dumbass]  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] im so gay  _

 

_ [dumbass] i been knew  _

 

_ [dumbass] whats with the announcement  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] stan was in a field of sunflowers and my life became complete  _

 

_ [dumbass] thats gay  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] says the guy with a bf  _

 

_ [dumbass] touche  _

 

_                                                     [the loserz club]  _

  
  


_ [jesus] discussion time:  _

 

_ [jesus] ryan from high school musical; gay or no  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] so fuckin gay  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] or are u forgetting i dont dance  _

 

_ [trashy] ryan was supposed to be gay but disney was like nah  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] i need a gay sequel where its their high school reunion and ryan gets with chad  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] I SUPPORT THIS  _

 

_ [softy] i would pay to see that  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] the title? High school musical 4: they gay now  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] 10/10 absolutely love it  _

  
  
  


_                                                      [dumbass - bitchie bill]  _

 

_ [dumbass] your so whipped  _

 

_ [bicthie bill] fuck off tozier  _

  
  
  


_                                                    [beautiful boy -billiam]  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] wanna hang out tmr  _

 

_ [billiam] of course  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] my place noon  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] be there or be square  _

 

_ [billiam] your adorable  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] *you’re _

  
  
  
  


_                                                [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [trashy] if my cousin was adopted what does that make him to me _

 

_ [jesus] mike was adopted  _

 

_ [trashy] no not mike  _

 

_ [trashy] a person can have more than one cousin you know  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] whose your cuz  _

 

_ [trashy] boris  _

 

_ [trashy] hes from the ukraine or some shit  _

 

_ [trashy] he might be coming on down to derry  _

 

_ [trashy] eds if he comes you gotta promise me im the only bad boy in your heart  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] richie i saw u trip up a flight of stairs  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] i luv u bby but you aint a bad boy  _

 

_ [trashy] gasp  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] richie you cried during the titanic  _

 

_ [trashy] no im a cool bad boy  _

 

_ [trashy] i ride motorcycles and smoke and skip classes  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] dont smoke its bad for ur lungs  _

 

_ [trashy] fine im a bad boy who dont smoke but rides motorcycles and skips classes  _

 

_ [softy] your a straight a student  _

 

_ [trashy] fine imma bad boy who rides motorcycles  _

 

_ [farm boy] richie  _

 

_ [farm boy] you drive a toyota corolla wagon thats older than all of us  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] sorry chee but your not a bad boy  _

  
  
  


_ [eds<3 - rich]  _

 

_ [eds<3] your a cute softie in my heart bby  _

 

_ [rich] awww your so cute  _

 

_ [eds<3] I love u   _

 

_ [rich] i love you too bby  _


	7. The Time When Richie Punched A Wall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy halloween! 
> 
>  
> 
> also: no one got my boris reference i think so imma explain it cause hes gonna be important later. He is a character from the goldfinch who's gonna be played by everyone's favorite eighties boy finn wolfhard so i was like 'hmm maybe boris should be richie cousin' so yeah. He speaks russian ukrainian and some english so yeah. expect that later, it will be pretty funny i hope

_  [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [trashy] UM  _ __   
  


_ [trashy] STAN BILL U GUYS WANNA EXPLAIN THIS  _

 

_ [trashy]  _ **_[softboyskissingnexttosomesunflowers.jpg]_ **

 

_ [trashy] WHY WAS THIS IN MY INSTAGRAM FEED  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] oh yeah we forgot to tell you guys  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] we’re together now   _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] YOU FUCKING FORGOT  _ __   
  


_ [trashy] you wanna know why they forgot  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] richie no  _

 

_ [trashy] they fuck _

 

_ [jesus] blocked.  _

 

_ [farm boy] yall can thank me for this  _

 

_ [softy] excuse me those sunflowers were my idea  _

 

_ [jesus] ruh ro  _

 

_ [trashy] fight fight fight fight  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] chee no  _

 

_ [trashy] sorry babe  _

 

_ [farm boy] thats two couples in the squad whos next  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] mike and eternal happiness  _

 

_ [trashy] mike and his farm  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] mike and being the matchmaker  _

 

_ [jesus] mike and being the best one  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] mike and being unproblematic  _

 

_ [softy] mike and being the only real one  _

 

_ [farm boy] i was angling for bev and ben but yall im about to cry  _

 

_ [farm boy] i love you guys  _

 

_ [trashy] we love u mikey  _

 

__

_                                                        [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] omg you guys the best thing just happened  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] in an effort to show me how bad boy he is richie punched a wall  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] how is this the best thing  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] immediately after he did it he looked me in the eyes and said ‘take me to a hospital  _

 

_ [trashy] were in the er rn  _

 

_ [trashy] i have a hairline fracture on my pinkie  _

 

_ [trashy] mans most least important finger am i right  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] he can’t move his finger  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] how is he typing rn  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] with his nose  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] NOW THAT IS THE BEST THING TO EVER HAPPEN  _

 

_ [softy] pics or it didn’t happen  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto]  _ **_[richtypingwithhisnose.jpg]_ **

 

_ [buckaroo bill] im in tears  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] he literally just fell on the ground from laughter  _

 

_ [trashy] very funny denbrough  _

 

_ [farm boy] aww u two are hanging out together  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] maybe  _

 

_ [jesus] we stan the softest couple on earth  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] me and rich?? are?? hurt??  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] ha suck it  _

  
  
  


_                                             [beautiful billy - my love] _

 

_ [beautiful billy] bby i miss u  _

 

_ [my love] we’re in the same class rn  _

 

_ [beautiful billy] i know but you’re on the other side of the room  _

 

_ [my love] awww u used the proper form of you’re  _

 

_ [beautiful billy] these are the commitments i make for u babe  _

 

_ [my love] uh i love u so much  _

 

_ [beautiful billy] i think u should come over after school  _

 

_ [beautiful billy] to study of course  _

 

_ [my love] yes of course  _

 

_ [my love] to study  _

 

_ [my love] will georgie be home  _

 

_ [my love] so he doesn’t interrupt studying  _

 

_ [beautiful billy] are we both talking about sex or do u actually want to study  _

 

_ [my love] sex bill  _

 

_ [beautiful billy] good  _

 

_ [my love] god i love u so much  _

  
  
  



	8. The Time When Boris Was Richie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im real sorry to anyone who hates boris/doesn't care but this is whats happening now 
> 
> (he wont be in it much maybe like in a few more chapters he might pop up again) 
> 
> also benverly at the end there

_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [farm boy] weirdest scar story go  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] i was biking and i hit a pothole straight on and my bike flipped and now ive got a line down my chin  _

 

_ [trashy] punched a baseball bat  _

 

_ [trashy] it splintered and went in my knuckle  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] when brendon urie came out as pan i was so excited i fell down the stairs  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] fell out of a tree while trying to get a baby bird out of a nest that was about to collapse  _

 

_ [jesus] slammed my head on a piano  _

 

_ [softy] really deep and large paper cut  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] rich why did u punch a baseball bat  _

 

_ [trashy] when i used to play baseball with stan i got in a fight with someone on the other team so i went to punch him and he swung his bat and it hit my fist  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] i remember that  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] stan your story is adorable  _

 

_ [farm boy] did u save the bird tho  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] i rolled my ankle on the way down the first time but i went back up again and then i fell and impaled my leg on a broken branch and then i went up again and saved him and he lived in my room until he learned how to fly  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] honestly that is the cutest thing ive ever heard i love you  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] his name was fluff  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] im coming over to your house right now  _

 

_ [trashy] they fuck  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] CHEE NO  _

 

_ [softy] are we not gonna talk about bevs  _

 

_ [jesus] i was fixing a piano and it fell down on my head  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] mike what about you  _

 

_ [farm boy] i was feeding the goats and my mind started wandering and the next thing i knew he was eating my finger  _

 

_ [softy] thats adorable yet also terrifying  _

 

_ [trashy] eds how do you get a scar from falling down the stairs  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] there was a sharp pencil at the bottom  _

 

_ [farm boy] NOPE NOPE  _

  
  


_ [the loserz club] _

 

_ [stanney the manney] why did richie just facetime me and say fuck u in a very deep accent  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] yeah hes been texting me in broken english all day  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] what the fuck happened to richie  _

 

_ [jesus] richie machine broke  _

 

_ [farm boy] haha  _

 

_ [trashy]  _ _ ебать всіх вас _

 

_ [stanney the manney] excuse me what the fuck  _

 

_ [softy] its ukrainian  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] how do you know  _

 

_ [softy] google translate _

 

_ [trashy] богатый мертв _

 

_ [jesus] thats russian  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] what the fuck is he saying  _

  
  


_ [softy] richie is dead  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] WHAT  _

 

_ [trashy] только борис сейчас _

 

_ [softy] only boris now  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] EXCUSE ME  _ __   
  


  
  


_                                                  [eds <3 - rich]  _

 

_ [eds<3] chee knock it off  _

 

_ [rich] who is chee  _

 

_ [eds<3] u  _

 

_ [eds<3] u are chee _

 

_ [rich] im boris not chee  _

 

_ [eds<3] richie cut the shit  _

 

_ [eds<3] ur kinda scaring me  _

 

_ [rich] eds dont be worried  _

 

_ [rich] i let my boris have my phone  _

 

_ [rich] are they freaking out  _

 

_ [eds<3] they’re using google translate and everyone’s really confused  _

 

_ [eds<3] i was probably the only one who was a little worried because he said that u were dead and i got sad  _

 

_ [rich] aww eds  _

 

_ [eds<3] i love you chee  _

 

_ [rich] chee loves u too  _

 

_ [eds<3] hello boris  _

  
  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] richies messing with all of you  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] remember boris richies cousin  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] he got richies phone  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] makes sense  _

 

_ [trashy] почему ты предал нас маленьким _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] ??  _

 

_ [softy] why would you betray us small one  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] IM NOT SMALL  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] oh lord  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] IM FIVE FOUR IM NOT SMALL  _

 

_ [trashy] your teeny tiny  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] *you’re  _

 

_ [jesus] well richies back  _

 

_ [farm boy] damn boris was kinda growing on me  _

 

__ **_farm boy has changed trashy’s name to: walmart boris_ **

 

_ [walmart boris] goddamnit mike  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] #bringbackboris2018  _

 

_ [walmart boris] not you too my sweet eds  _

_ [stanney the manney] boris was pretty lit  _

 

_ [walmart boris] DAMN EVEN MY BEST FRIEND  _ __   
  


_ [softy] i prefer you richie :)  _

 

_ [jesus] i have the strong urge to protect ben from the world  _

 

_ [jesus] hes too pure  _

 

_ [softy] i love u bev :)  _

 

_ [jesus] MY HEART  _


	9. The Time When Eddie Confirmed It

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MORE MARVEL MORE MARVEL MORE MARVEL 
> 
> sorry its kinda short (like richies dick) 
> 
> (catch my b99 joke and ill love u forever)

 

_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] u guys im feeling rebellious  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] lets do something stupid  _

 

_ [walmart boris] im stupid do me  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] maybe i will  _

 

_ [farm boy] i dont think we give rich enough credit  _

 

_ [farm boy] hes kinda smooth  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] oh lord dont say that  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] itll go right to his head  _

 

_ [walmart boris] IM SMOOTH  _

 

_ [walmart boris] YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] christ  _

 

_ [farm boy] i regret everything  _

 

_ [softy] k but richies actually smooth  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] are we talking about the same richie who thought he wasnt gonna be allowed into the movies because ‘would they let a snack like me in’  _

 

_ [jesus] cancelled  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] he once asked me to watch him run around the world and then he just ran around me  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] that is the straightest shit ive ever heard  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] u know whose smooth  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] my beautiful boyfriend thats who  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] please provide one example  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] when richie said that life was hard like his dick and you said that life was also short  _

 

_ [jesus] iconic.  _

 

_ [softy] wheres the lie  _

 

_ [eddo spaghetto] well…  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] DID EDDIE JUST SAY RICHIES GOT A BIG DICK  _

 

_ [farm boy] im control alt deleting myself  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] can i join u  _

 

_ [walmart boris] eds never lies  _

 

_ [jesus] GOODBYE  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [jesus] I DID NOT NEED TO KNOW THAT  _ __   
  


_ [softy] goodbye world :)  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] MIKE STAN AND BEN ARE DEAD LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE  _ __   
  


_ [buckaroo bill] I WILL AVENGE MY BOY  _

_ [stanney the manney] avengers its time to work for a living  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] i love you so much your my dream guy  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] i really appreciate that and i love you more than anything in this world but  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] *you’re  _

 

_ [softy] top 10 anime betrayals  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] i love my boyfriend so much  _

 

_ [buckaroo bill] put it on my grave  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] i have an idea  _

  
  


__ **_stanney the manney has changed buckaroo bill’s name to: gamora_ **

__ **_stanney the manney has changed their name to: peter quill_ **

 

_ [peter quill] there  _

 

_ [gamora] goddamn i cant anymore  _

 

_ [peter quill] you’re my dream guy bill  _

 

_ [gamora] and you’re mine  _

 

_ [walmart boris] EDS QUICK WE NEED A CUTE COUPLE NICKNAME  _

  
  


__ **_eddo spaghetto has changed walmart boris’s name to: jim_ **

**_eddo spaghetto has changed their name to: pam_ **

 

_ [jim] DO WE WIN  _

 

_ [jesus] the judges say  _

 

_ [softy] tie  _

 

_ [jesus] jim and pam  _

 

_ [farm boy] gamora n peter  _

 

_ [peter quill] damn we tied  _

 

_ [gamora] NOW WE CAN QUOTE EVEN MORE MARVEL  _

 

_ [peter quill] !!!!!!!!!! _

 

_ [softy] mR stARk i dOnT fEeL sO gOOd  _

 

_ [farm boy] dont.  _

  
  



	10. The Time When Stan And Bill Watched Gifted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im real sorry about that turn it took at the end there but i felt like people were getting bored of the constant fluff so i spiced it up 
> 
> it wont amount to anything too bad 
> 
> also fight me stenbrough loves the maze runner

_ [rich - eds<3]  _

 

_ [rich] do you like bad boys _

 

_ [eds<3] um excuse me  _

 

_ [rich] not to brag but uh  _

 

_ [rich] i had 3 gummy vitamins this morning instead of 2  _

 

_ [eds<3] come over now please  _

 

_ [rich] yessir  _

 

_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [peter quill] sometimes i regret living next to eddie  _

 

_ [softy] do elaborate  _

 

_ [peter quill] richie came over and he left his fucking blinds open  _

 

_ [peter quill] its like the worst part of a zoo  _

 

_ [jesus] why are u looking then  _

 

_ [peter quill] its not like i really have a choice that window is right next to my bed  _

 

_ [gamora] u can come over to my place and we can watch a movie  _

  
  


_                                                          [beautiful boy - my love]  _

  
  


_ [beautiful boy] what movie are you thinking  _

 

_ [my love] what do u want  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] whatever u want im not picky  _

 

_ [my love] how about gifted  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] never heard of it  _

 

_ [my love] cevans raises his niece who is like a child prodigy  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] who plays the niece  _

 

_ [my love] mckenna grace  _

 

_ [my love] young tonya in i tonya  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] oh shit  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] strong contender but i counter with  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] about a boy  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] a child of divorce whose mom has depression meets a laid back guy and hilarity and sadness insue  _

 

_ [my love] i love that movie  _

 

_ [my love] final option: maze runner  _

 

_ [my love] we both love newt and dylan obrien is pretty fuckin  _

 

_ [my love] neat  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] u can say hot its okay  _

 

_ [my love] stan my love hes so much more than hot that man is like a fucking volcano  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] honestly _

 

_ [my love] alright cast your vote  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] gifted  _

 

_ [my love] gifted  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] im sneaking out ill be there in 5  _

 

_ [my love] i love a bad boy  _

 

__

_                                                                 [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [softy] so bill what movie did u decide on  _

 

_ [gamora] how did u know  _

 

_ [jesus] we all live on the same block i can see stan  _

 

_ [farm boy] u could say  _

 

_ [farm boy] you were  _

 

_ [farm boy] on my block  _

 

_ [softy] dont.  _

 

_ [jesus] mike u live on a farm 10 minutes away  _

 

_ [pam] i love that show  _

 

_ [jim] what they did to ruby was fucked up  _

 

_ [peter quill] AND JAMAL GOT THE CASH IT WAS WILD  _

 

_ [softy] SPOILERS  _

 

_ [jesus] everyone shut up me and ben are watching it now  _

 

_ [farm boy] awwwweee  _

 

_ [jesus] you know what  _

 

_ [jesus] well take it  _

 

_ [softy] no but actually what movie did u decide on  _

 

_ [peter quill] gifted because we love cevans  _

 

_ [jesus] best be ready to cry  _

  
  
  


_ [the loserz club] _

 

_ [peter quill] fUCK THAT WAS TOO SAD  _

 

_ [gamora] WHEN FRANK AND MARY REUNITED HE CRIED SO MUCH HE USED AN ENTIRE PACK OF TISSUES  _

 

_ [peter quill] IT WAS SAD BILL  _

 

_ [jim] stan has emotions confirmed  _

 

_ [pam] robot stan is gone  _

 

_ [softy] pics or it didnt happen  _

 

_ [gamora]  _ **_[mysadbf.jpg]_ **

 

_ [jesus] awwww  _

 

_ [peter quill] DONT MAKE FUN OF ME IM SAD  _

 

_ [gamora] yes if any of u make fun of him i will come to your house and personally murder u  _

 

_ [farm boy] as opposed to  _

 

_ [gamora] hiring a hitman duh  _

 

_ [jim] we stan the softest couple  _

 

_ [gamora] HA u admit it  _

 

_ [pam] could u give me the number of that hitman  _

 

_ [farm boy] ominous  _

 

_ [gamora] for who…  _

 

_ [peter quill] i knew it  _

 

_ [peter quill] u only got with richie so u could murder him  _

 

_ [gamora] my mother  _

  
  
  
  
  


_ [rich - eds<3] _

 

_ [rich] what did that woman do  _

 

_ [rich] if she laid a hand on u i swear to christ  _

 

_ [eds<3] she saw u sneaking out  _

 

_ [eds<3] grounded for two weeks  _

 

_ [eds<3] and locks on my windows  _

 

_ [rich] fuck eddie im so sorry  _

 

_ [rich] its my fault  _

 

_ [eds<3] no its fine rich  _

 

_ [rich] eds its really not  _

 

_ [rich] to quote ron weasley  _

 

_ [rich] SHE PUT BARS ON YOUR WINDOW  _

 

_ [eds<3] she didnt put bars on my window  _

 

_ [eds<3] really its fine  _

 

_ [rich] if she touches you  _

 

_ [rich] call me immediately _

 

_ [eds<3] chee _

 

_ [rich] promise me  _

 

_ [rich] please  _

 

_ [eds<3] i promise  _

 


	11. The Time When They Went To A Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bro this is a wild one 
> 
> im real tired too so all the spelling is bad but its fine theyre all drunk

_ [eddio - bird boy] _

 

_ [eddio] can i sleep at your place tonight  _

 

_ [bird boy] sure why  _

 

_ [eddio] my mom caught rich sneaking out of my house  _

 

_ [eddio] she put locks on my window  _

 

_ [eddio] im just not in the mood to be around her  _

 

_ [bird boy] how tf are u gonna get to my place then  _

 

_ [eddio] back door  _

 

_ [bird boy] alright come on over  _

 

_ [bird boy] did u tell richie  _

 

_ [eddio] yeah  _

 

_ [bird boy] howd he take it  _

 

_ [eddio] im not sure  _

 

_ [eddio]  _ **_[richiefindingout.jpg]_ **

 

_ [bird boy] thats  _

 

_ [bird boy] actually not as bad as i thought  _

  
  
  
  
  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [jim] GUYS THIS IS NOT A DRILL  _

 

_ [jim] P!ATD RELEASED A GREATEST SHOW COVER AND THERES GONNA BE A WHOLE ALBUM AHH  _

 

_ [pam] ASJJSAJSAJASJSJKJHDFJK _

 

_ [peter quill] we mfing stan  _

 

_ [gamora] hOLY sHIT  _

 

_ [softy] its absolutely amazing  _

 

_ [farm boy] i dont listen to panic  _

 

_ [pam] EXCUSE ME MIKE  _ _   
_ _   
_ __ [pam] I WILL BE AT YOUR HOUSE IN 10 MINUTES WITH THE ENTIRE P!ATD DISCOLOGY 

 

_ [farm boy] christ  _

 

_ [peter quill] OOO can i come  _

 

_ [pam] EVERYONE IS INVITED TO WORSHIP THIS PAN LEGEND  _

 

_ [jim] PANIC TIME AT MIKES HOUSE  _

  
  
  
  


_                                                            [rich - eds <3]  _

  
  


_ [rich] thought u were grounded kaspbrak  _

 

_ [eds<3] my moms at work  _

 

_ [rich] oo your gonna sneak out  _

 

_ [eds<3] ill have to leave before we finish but you can keep the tracks until school tmr  _

 

_ [rich] ill listen to them every nigh  _

 

_ [rich] JFNKJ _

 

_ [rich] im making you a present  _

  
  
  


_ [the loserz club] _

 

_ [farm boy] eddie did it  _

 

_ [farm boy] im obssessed with panic at the disco now  _

 

_ [peter quill] *obsessed  _

 

_ [jesus] guys _

 

_ [jesus] party time  _

 

_ [jim] just give the address ill be there in 5  _

 

_ [gamora] losers club  _

 

_ [gamora] assemble at my house  _

 

_ [pam] grounded remember?  _

 

_ [gamora] oh  _

 

_ [pam] its fine you guys go on  _

 

_ [pam] just facetime me while your there  _

 

_ [jim] ill miss u my spaghetti  _

 

_ [pam] ill miss u too chee  _

 

_ [pam] and give me constant updates  _

  
  
  


_                                                                  [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [farm boy] weve been here for three minutes and bev and richie are already drunk  _

 

_ [jim] WAT A FCUKIN LIE BEN =JAMIN  _

 

_ [farm boy] im mike but okay  _

 

_ [jim] HA HEB KLIESSSS AGU  _

 

_ [pam] agu  _

 

_ [jesus] IM NOT DRUNK U LIE MOTHDUCK _

 

_ [pam] thats right  _

 

_ [pam] bevs an aggressive drunk  _

 

_ [gamora] THEYRE PLAYING PANIC  _

 

_ [peter quill] FUCK A SILVER LINNING  _

 

_ [pam] i love that one  _

 

_ [softy] u guys we have a problem  _

 

_ [softy] stan found the alcohol table  _

 

_ [peterquill]ILOVEPANOIVCATFTHEDICASOITSUFMYFvoODIANDILOVETHSIAONSGDTHEYHSOIULDPOAKHAFRICA   _

 

_ [gamora] whered he go  _

 

_ [peter quill] YPULLNEVERFINDBEBIKRL _

 

_ [softy] BILL QUICK THE POOL  _

 

_ [jim] GUYS OM MISSSSSSMYBD _

 

_ [pam] your big dick?  _

 

_ [farm boy] please dont remind me  _

 

_ [farm boy] ahh girls are hitting on me help _

 

_ [jesus] ill fight them  _

 

_ [pam] BEV NO  _

 

_ [pam] i leave u alone for 13 minutes and this is a list of whats happened _

 

_ [pam] richie and bev are drunk after 3 minutes  _

 

_ [pam] stan found the alcohol and is doing something at the pool  _

 

_ [pam] bill is running around trying to assemble everyone  _

 

_ [pam] people are hitting on mike  _

 

_ [pam] and bevs about to fight  _

 

_ [pam] greaaatt job guys  _

 

_ [gamora] STANANA DESD _

 

_ [pam] EXCUSE ME  _

 

_ [gamora] IMHOLDIG MY BAB IN ME AROMS _

 

_ [softy] stan tried to jump off the shed and do a backflip into the pool but he hit his head on the bottom  _

 

_ [pam] OMG YOU KILLED STAN  _

 

_ [jim] sATAN WAS MY BESTJFRIEN SAND NOW HWE GSOAN _

 

_ [softy] hes fine i dove in and got him up hes breathing  _

 

_ [softy] bill is just also drunk  _

  
  
  


_ [pam] okay so whos not drunk  _

 

_ [farm boy] me  _

 

_ [softy] me _

 

_ [jesus] MW  _

 

_ [pam] no bev your drunk  _

 

_ [jim] HWEBHJPA, _

 

_ [pam] christ is richie okay  _

 

_ [jim] Yuo _

 

_ [pam] well losers im gonna go to sleep now  _

 

_ [pam] party responsibly my friends  _

  
  
  
  


_                                                                  [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [peter quill] wtf happened last night  _

 

_ [peter quill] i blacked out  _

 

_ [gamora] you got real drunk, tried to backflip into a pool, almost drowned, tried to color my face with a highlighter cause im ‘important’ and then fell asleep on me  _

 

_ [jesus] this just in  _

 

_ [jesus] stans a blackout drunk  _

  
  



	12. The Time When Eddie Got A Mixtape

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this chapter is so short i was super excited to get it out 
> 
> and... 
> 
> YOU CAN LISTEN TO RICHIES MIXTAPE HERE:  
> https://open.spotify.com/user/._.hello/playlist/4e1045uDGLby1LxTuIMjJS?si=7P92QkOnRvSVyNueER7rCA
> 
> highly recommend theres some good songs there

_  [rich - stan - bill - mike - bev - ben]  _

  
  


_ [rich] I NEED SONGS  _ _   
_ _   
_ __ [stan] which type 

 

_ [rich] LOVE SONGS AND THINGS LIKE THAT  _

 

_ [rich] IM MAKING A PLAYLIST FOR EDDIE  _

 

_ [bill] awww _

_ [mike] the loser _

 

_ [rich] huh  _

 

_ [mike] the loser - zach farache  _

 

_ [mike] its a classic  _

 

_ [stan] can never go wrong with some africa  _

 

_ [bill] i really think some kickass lover is a day is appropriate  _

 

_ [ben] someone new hozier  _

 

_ [bev] death of a bachelor  _

 

_ [rich] loving stans idea for some classic rock  _

 

_ [rich] should i do love song  _

 

_ [stan] absolutely  _

 

_ [stan] and heroes  _

 

_ [rich] smart  _

 

_ [bill] STRAWBERRIES AND CIGARETTES BY TROYE  _

 

_ [bill] ive thought long and hard about which troye sivan song would be best for each of us  _

 

_ [stan] whatd we get  _

 

_ [bill] talk me down  _

 

_ [stan] shit i love that song  _

 

_ [rich] GUYS  _

 

_ [rich] JUST A FEW MORE PLEASE  _

 

_ [ben] void by the neighborhood?  _

 

_ [rich] meh  _

 

_ [bev] sweater weather  _

 

_ [rich] finally some good fucking food  _

 

_ [stan] bloom later  _

 

_ [rich] nah not my style  _

 

_ [bill] MISS JACKSON  _

 

_ [rich] yes  _

 

_ [rich] WE DID IT  _

  
  
  


_ [rich - eds<3]  _

 

_ [rich] is your mom home  _

 

_ [eds<3] no why  _

 

_ [rich] im coming over i got a present for you  _

 

_ [eds<3] chee  _

 

_ [eds<3] ily  _

 

_ [rich] ily2  _

 

_ [rich] be there in 3  _

 

_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [pam] guyyysss richie made me a mixtape  _

 

_ [peter quill] what is this the 80s  _

 

_ [gamora] we helped make it  _

 

_ [peter quill] i suggested all the rock your welcome  _

 

_ [softy] i did the hozier  _

 

_ [bill] troye sivan  _

 

_ [pam] shhhhiiitt i love troye sivan  _

 

_ [peter quill] i know who doesnt  _

 

_ [softy] can we have another music binger _

 

_ [pam] bring all the troye you have to bens house  _

 

_ [peter quill] be there in 10  _

  
  


_                                                                    [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [gamora] hey guys  _

 

_ [gamora] its georgie  _

 

_ [peter quill] hey georgie  _

 

_ [gamora] who are u  _

 

**_peter quill changed their name to: stan with a plan_ **

**_stan with a plan changed jims name to: trashcan_ **

**_stan with a plan changed gamora’s name to: billiam_ **

**_stan with a plan changed pam’s name to: eds_ **

 

_ [stan with a plan] better? _

 

_ [billiam] much thank you  _

 

_ [eds] hey whyd u change my name to eds  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] richie was gonna do it anyways  _

 

_ [trashcan] hes right i was  _

 

_ [billiam] you all should come over tmr night to play d&d  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] im down  _

 

_ [farm boy] ill be there  _

 

_ [softy] ditto  _

 

_ [eds] yeah  _

 

_ [trashcan] wherever eds is im there  _

 

_ [billiam] alright see ya tmr!  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] bye georgie!  _

 

_ [billiam] bills back and better than ever  _

 

_ [trashcan] what are you advertising an iphone _

 

_ [billiam] beep beep  _


	13. The Time When Richie Was A Good Influence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE COMMENT SUGGESTIONS IM RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS 
> 
> THESE CHAPTERS ARE GETTING WORSE AND WORSE AND I REALLY DONT WANT TO END THIS BUT I MIGHT CAUSE ITS LOOSING QUALITY

_ [the loserz club]  _

  
  


_ [stan with a plan] uh i fuckin bombed my history test  _

 

_ [softy] why u gotta bring yourself down like that  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] i was already down  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] this is just overkill  _

 

_ [billiam] NEXT PERSON THAT INSULTS MY BF IS GONNA GET MY FIST IN THEIR FACE  _

 

_ [trashcan] ???  _

 

_ [trashcan] that was  _

 

_ [trashcan] unprovoked  _

 

_ [billiam] I HEARD SOME BITCHES TALKING SHIT SO I WENT UP AND SAID THATS MY BOYFRIEND BITCH AND PUNCHED HIM  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] was it henry  _

 

_ [billiam] maybe  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] did you get detention  _

 

_ [billiam] oh most definitely  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] goddamnit bill  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] u dont have to do that  _

 

_ [billiam] well it was pissing me off  _

 

_ [billiam] youre a perfect person and u dont deserve to have them talk about u like that  _

 

_ [billiam] especially if its something as fucking pathetic as you dating a guy  _

 

_ [jesus] oo tea  _

 

_ [trashcan] damn bill went off  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] we’re moving to private   _

  
  
  


_                                                                    [beautiful boy - my love]  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] bill really its fine  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i dont give a shit about how the hell talks about me  _

_ [my love] well i do  _

 

_ [my love] i refuse to stand back and let some assholes talk shit about you  _

 

_ [my love] not on my watch stanley uris _

 

_ [my love] you dont deserve that shit  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] maybe i do  _

 

_ [my love] babe are you okay  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] im fine.  _

 

_ [my love] punctuation suggests otherwise  _

 

_ [my love] whats going on  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] can we talk about it in person  _

 

_ [my love] of course  _

  
  
  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [trashcan] did i leave my hoodie at your place eds  _

 

_ [eds] nope  _

 

_ [trashcan] could you look around  _

 

_ [trashcan] wait youre wearing it arent you  _

 

_ [eds] maybe _

 

_ [trashcan] damnit thats my best hoodie  _

 

_ [eds] well im still grounded and it smells like u  _

 

_ [jesus] eddie is breathing in richies scent like a third grader trying to get high off a sharpie  _

 

_ [softy] i did that once  _

 

_ [jesus] BEN GOT HIGH  _

 

_ [softy] for like 3 minutes  _

 

_ [softy] i was coloring with sharpies and i accidentally got high _

 

_ [trashcan] aww thats so cute  _

 

_ [trashcan] i love ben _

 

_ [farm boy] guys we have a problem  _

 

_ [farm boy] the sheep pen broke and all the sheep are loose  _

 

_ [trashcan] im on my way  _

 

_ [jesus] omw  _

 

_ [softy] be right there  _

 

_ [eds] sneaking out now  _

 

_ [billiam] cant  _

 

_ [billiam] a bigger problem at hand  _

  
  
  


_ [edDIE - billy]  _

 

_ [edDIE] what was that probelm earlier  _

 

_ [billy] i cant say  _

 

_ [edDIE] i knew it  _

 

_ [edDIE] you work for the government  _

 

_ [billy] no its just something with stan  _

 

_ [billy] i gtg  _

 

_ [billy] sleep calls  _

 

_ [edDIE] gn bill  _

  
  
  


_ [eds<3 - rich]  _

 

_ [eds<3] somethings up with stan  _

 

_ [rich] NOT MY FUCKING BEST FRIEND  _

 

_ [rich] sorry babe  _

 

_ [eds<3] nah its chill u can have more than one  _

  
  
  
  


_                                                              [richie - bord]  _

 

_ [richie] who do you need me to beat up  _

 

_ [bord] excuse me  _

 

_ [richie] whos making u emo  _

 

_ [richie] theyre gonna have a meeting with my fist  _

 

_ [bord] richie you have never won a fight  _

 

_ [bord] also this was unprovoked  _

 

_ [richie] your sad  _

 

_ [richie] why  _

 

_ [bord] its fine just school shit  _

 

_ [bord] im failing some of my classes and my parents are upset and rumors and things  _

 

_ [bord] im absolutely delightful  _

_ [richie] STANLEY URIS DO NOT LIE TO ME  _ __   
  


_ [bord] fine its not delightful its shit  _

 

_ [bord] ill be over it in a week  _

 

_ [richie] u can always talk to me  _

 

_ [bord] i know  _

  
  


_                                                                  [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [farm boy] all sheep have been found  _

 

_ [farm boy] theyre all safe  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] yay!  _

  
  
  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [trashcan] stan  _

 

_ [trashcan] are you live tweeting a test?? _

 

_ [stan with a plan] maybe  _

 

_ [trashcan] did you just tweet about me  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] maybe  _

 

_ [billiam] dude whatd u get for number 7  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] abe lincoln  _

 

_ [billiam] THIS IS AN AP GEOMETRY TEST  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] teach u to try and cheat _

 

_ [trashcan] both of u  _

 

_ [trashcan] pay attention to the test  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] fine.  _

 

_ [eds] was richie just  _

 

_ [eds] a good infulence  _

 

_ [trashcan] id like to think im always a good influence  _

 

_ [farm boy] when u got the flu u insisted on snorting the meds  _

 

_ [trashcan] its an effective strategy  _

 

_ [softy] u taught georgie swears  _

 

_ [trashcan] out of love  _

 

_ [billiam] he told me to fuck off when i ate the last cookie  _

 

_ [eds] serves u right for eating the last cookie  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] poor georgie  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] talking to richie is a bad influence on the children  _


	14. The Time When It All Went To Shit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh sorry this was angsty but someone asked for it 
> 
> im gonna start incorporating more of a storyline just cause i felt likt this was getting a little bland 
> 
> (stanandgeorgieisthebestduoucantchangemymind)

_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] tag yourself as a john mulaney quote go  _

 

_ [softy] you could poor soup in my lap and id apologize to u  _

 

_ [jesus] sometimes babies point at me and i dont care for that shit at all  _

 

_ [eds] im very gay and id like a few dollars  _

 

_ [trashcan] anyone whos seen my dick and met my parents needs to die  _

 

_ [billiam] SCATTER  _

 

_ [farm boy] ill keep all my emotions right here and then ill die  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] brush your teeth now BOOM orange juice thats life  _

 

_ [billiam] mike are u okay  _

 

_ [eds] who hurt u  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] gtg beat up whoever hurt mikey  _

 

_ [trashcan] great joke  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] excuse me  _

 

_ [trashcan] u dont scare me little man  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] richie im taller than u  _

 

_ [trashcan] maybe in hell u are  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] with u im already there  _

 

_ [jesus] SHIT  _

 

_ [softy] guys!!!  _

 

_ [softy] my hufflepuff scarf is here!!! :)  _

 

_ [jesus] :0  _

 

_ [softy]  _ **_[literallythecutestpersonever.jpg]_ **

 

_ [jesus] BEN I LOVE YOU SO MUCH  _

 

_ [farm boy] FUCK YES HUFFLEPUFFS REPRESENT!  _

 

_ [trashcan] hhhhhh gryffindor is superior  _

 

_ [billiam] ^^^^  _

 

_ [eds] tea  _

 

_ [jesus] SLYTHERIN SLYTHERIN SLYTHERIN  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] i think yall are forgetting ravenclaw  _

 

_ [trashcan] has anyone ever remebered ravenclaw  _

 

_ [eds] NAME ONE PERSON RAVENCLAW CONTRIBUTED TO HARRY POTTER  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] LUNA LOVEGOOD  _ __   
  


_ [stan with a plan] CHO CHANG  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] I THINK THE REAL FORGOTTEN HOUSE HERE IS HUFFLEPUFF  _

 

_ [farm boy] EXCUSE ME  _

 

_ [farm boy] HUFFLEPUFF GAVE HOGWARTS CEDRIC DIGGORY THE BEST HARRY POTTER CHARCATER NAY THE BEST STUDENT TO EVER ATTENED HOGWARTS  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] oh yeah?  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] then why did he die in his first and only movie  _

 

_ [jesus] oh shiT  _

 

_ [softy] STANELY FUCKING URIS THAT WAS TOO SOON AND YOU KNOW IT  _

 

_ [billiam] ben  _

 

_ [billiam] ben sweared  _

 

_ [eds] i have never heard ben swear  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] your right it was too soon  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] im sorry  _

 

_ [trashcan] ultimate controversy: harry and ron vs hermione and ron  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] THIS IS SO HARD FOR ME CAUSE ON ONE HAND CUTIES HERMIONE AND RON ARE LIKE MADE FOR EACHOTHER BUT ALSO HARRY AND RON WOULD BE AMAZING  _

 

_ [jesus] option 3: draco and harry  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH _

 

_ [stan with a plan] DECISIONS _

 

_ [billiam] harry and draco, ron and hermione, and luna and ginny sorry i only speak facts  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] i love you so much you help me see clearly  _

 

_ [billiam] i love you too babe  _

  
  
  


_ [eds<3 - rich]  _

 

_ [eds<3] rich  _

 

_ [rich] yeah  _

 

_ [eds<3] can i stay over tonight  _

 

_ [rich] of course  _

 

_ [eds<3] and the day after  _

 

_ [eds<3] and probably the next day  _

 

_ [rich] eddie what happened  _

 

_ [eds<3] i got kicked out  _

 

_ [eds<3 - rich]  _

 

_ [rich] for fucks sake  _

 

_ [eds<3] she found out i was gay  _

 

_ [rich] come over here right now  _

 

_ [rich] while shes out tmr ill go back and get all of your stuff  _

 

_ [eds<3] okay  _

_ [rich] baby if this was my fault im sorry i should have been more careful when i left  _

 

_ [eds<3] its not your fault chee  _

  
  
  


_ [richie - staniel] _

 

_ [richie] stan if i trust you with some TOP SECRET info will you promise not to tell anyone  _

 

_ [staniel] you have my word  _

 

_ [richie] eddie doesnt know im telling you this but  _

 

_ [richie] he got kicked out  _

 

_ [staniel] let me guess you need backup to kick sonias ass and im already on my way  _

 

_ [richie] no not yet  _

 

_ [richie] just break in to eddies room and get his stuff  _

 

_ [richie] laptop hw clothes and shit  _

 

_ [staniel] you got it  _

  
  
  
  


_ [beautiful boy - my love]  _

  
  


_ [beautiful boy] bill i need help  _

 

_ [my love] ill be at your house right away  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] no im at eddies  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] under the tree next to his window  _

 

_ [my love] ill be right there  _

  
  


_ [richie - staniel] _

 

_ [richie] stan where are you  _

 

_ [richie] this is serious shit lets go  _

 

_ [richie] stanley im counting on you  _

 

_ [staniel] stans in the hospital this is bill  _

 

_ [richie] SHIT WHAT HAPPENED  _

 

_ [staniel] whilst trying to jimmy eddies window lock he fell out of the tree  _

 

_ [staniel] doctor said that he broke his knee and snapped his ankle  _

 

_ [richie] did sonia hear u  _

 

_ [staniel] she came out to look for someone i just grabbed stan and ran home  _

 

_ [richie] christ  _

 

_ [richie] hows stan doing  _

 

_ [staniel] they knocked him out to do some surgery hes still out  _

 

_ [richie] did u get hurt  _

 

_ [staniel] no  _

 

_ [richie] ill get everyone else and get to the hospital  _

  
  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [trashcan] losers club assemble  _

 

_ [softy] where  _

 

_ [billiam] derry hospital  _

 

_ [jesus] what happened now  _

 

_ [farm boy] i cant  _

 

_ [farm boy] my parents will kill me if they catch me sneaking out rn  _

 

_ [billiam] stans in the hospital  _

 

_ [farm boy] forget it im biking there now  _

 

_ [softy] what happened  _

 

_ [billiam] ill explain when you all get here  _

 

_ [eds] jesus christ  _

  
  
  
  


_ [billy boy - trashmouth]  _

 

_ [billy boy] on your way over  _

 

_ [billy boy] can u stop and my house and tell my mom im not gonna be home  _

 

_ [billy boy] georgie too  _

 

_ [billy boy] im not gonna leave this fucking hospital until he wakes up  _

 

_ [trashmouth] its the least i can do  _

 

_ [trashmouth] i mean i fucking put him up to this  _

 

_ [trashmouth] i should have known stan couldnt break into a house  _

 

_ [billy boy] tell georgie that stans gonna be just fine  _

  
  
  


_ [eddio - bird boy]  _

 

_ [eddio] stan i know your not awake but i wanted to say that this is all my fault  _

 

_ [eddio] you shouldnt have gone to get my stuff  _

_ [eddio] i should have done it but i was too fucking scared to go back  _

 

_ [eddio] im sorry  _

  
  
  


_                                             [number unknown - stanley uris]  _

 

_ [number unknown] hiya stan its me georgie  _

 

_ [number unknown] richie gave me your number when he came over  _

 

_ [number unknown] i hope you get better  _

 

_ [number unknown] i know that billys at the hospital with you _

 

_ [number unknown] he wont leave you  _

 

_ [number unknown] thats what richie told me  _

 

_ [number unknown] im gonna miss billy but you should have him tonight  _

 

_ [number unknown] i remember when you saved me at the carnival  _

 

_ [number unknown] your my hero stan  _


	15. The Time When They Had A Realization

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow look who finally got a plot 
> 
> ya girl

 

_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] georgie is the cutest kid ever  _

 

_ [stan with a plan]  _ **_[youremyhero.jpg]_ **

 

_ [jesus] AHHHHHHHHHWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW _

 

_ [softy] im gonna cry that is adorable  _

 

_ [farm boy] its like the end of gifted FUCK  _

 

_ [eds] WHY WOULD YOU BRIGN UP GIFTED NOW IM CRYING _ __   
  


_ [trashcan] i think we always knew georgie was the cutest  _

 

_ [billiam] FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK  _

 

_ [billiam] MR STARK I DONT FEEL SO GOOD  _

 

_ [billiam] MY TWO SWEET BOYS  _

 

_ [billiam] IM LITERALLY DYING  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] no please dont die  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] i just got released from the hospital  _

 

_ [trashcan] speaking of  _

 

_ [trashcan] movie night  _

 

_ [trashcan] what are we watching  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] breakfast club  _

 

_ [billiam] gotg2  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] NEVERMIND I WANT GOTG2  _

 

_ [softy] im good with that  _

 

_ [jesus] ditto  _

 

_ [eds] fucking love that movie  _

 

_ [farm boy] down  _

 

_ [trashcan] stan gets pick he fell out of a tree  _

 

_ [jesus] also  _

 

_ [softy] bev and i want to say something  _

 

_ [jesus] we’re dating  _

 

_ [farm boy] been knew  _

 

_ [softy] HOW  _

 

_ [trashcan] yall arent the best at hiding it  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] im gonna level with you  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] this entire time i thought you were dating  _

 

_ [jesus] damn really  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] yeah  _

 

_ [billy - edDIE]  _

 

_ [billy] if you dont mind me asking  _

 

_ [billy] how did sonia find out  _

 

_ [edDIE] there was a note in my backpack  _

 

_ [edDIE] it was some thing about how im a fairy and shit and she like lost it  _

 

_ [edDIE] she said that she was gonna send me to one of those gay conversion camp things but decided against spending all that money  _

 

_ [edDIE] she told me that i can go live with my burnout boyfriend  _

 

_ [billy] shit eddie im sorry  _

 

_ [edDIE] jokes on her i am  _

 

_ [billy] who the fuck put that note in your bag  _

 

_ [billy] i gotta go beat up two bitches now  _

 

_ [edDIE] two? _

 

_ [billy] some asshole is putting shit on stans locker  _

 

_ [billy] he hasnt seen it cause i take it down before he gets there but some of what they say  _

 

_ [billy] it just fucking sucks  _

 

_ [edDIE] people are such assholes  _

 

_ [billy] yeah  _

  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [trashcan] everyone tag yourself as a brooklyn nine nine character go  _

 

_ [farm boy] terry  _

 

_ [softy] boyle  _

 

_ [jesus] gina  _

 

_ [eds] amy  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] rosa  _

 

_ [bill] doug judy  _

 

_ [trashcan] jake  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] that worked out well  _

 

_ [eds] i really thought richie and bill were gonna argue over jake  _

 

_ [bill] judy is like jake but a criminal  _

 

_ [bill] totally me  _

 

_ [farm boy] fair  _

 

_ [softy] mike important question  _

 

_ [softy] do u like yogurt  _

 

_ [farm boy] best food 10/10  _

 

_ [softy] ill take that as a yes  _

 

_ [eds] WHOS HOLT  _

 

_ [trashcan] boris  _

  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] ive had a horrible realization  _

 

_ [eds] oh lord  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] RICHIE IS JUST OFF BRAND RODRICK  _

 

_ [billiam] TEA   _

 

_ [farm boy] HOLY SHIT YOUR RIGHT  _ __   
  


_ [eds] IM LOOSING MY SHIT  _

 

_ [jesus] #notmyrodrick  _

 

_ [trashcan] damn they found my secret aesthetic  _

 

_ [eds] richie could never  _

 

_ [softy] rodrick is the bad boy richie always wanted to be  _

 

_ [billiam] bi awakening: rodrick  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] hhhhhhh li shang  _

 

_ [eds] OOOO TEA  _

 

_ [jesus] christ li shang was the fuckin best  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] BE A MAN  _

 

_ [eds] YOU MUST BE SWIFT AS A COURSING RIVER  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] BE A MAN  _

 

_ [eds] WITH ALL THE FORCE OF A GREAT TYPHOON  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] BE A MAN  _

 

_ [eds] WITH ALL THE STRENGTH OF A RAGING FIRE  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] MYSTERIOUS AS THE DARK SIDE OF THE MOOOOOOOOOOOON  _

 

_ [billiam] that was beautiful  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] thanks  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] its my favorite movie  _

 

_ [billiam] OVER GOTG GASP  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] disney movie i meant  _

  
  
  


_ [bitchie bill - dumbass]  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] people just really suck  _

 

_ [dumbass] what happened  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] people  _

 

_ [dumbass] yes but which ones  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] fucking henry _

 

_ [dumbass] what did that dickwad do  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i shouldnt say  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] not my place  _

 

_ [dumbass] wooow so your gonna vague vent to me and leave  _

 

_ [dumbass] what am i a therapist _

 

_ [bitchie bill] he put the note in eddies bag that sonia found and kicked him out over  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] he also keeps putting shit on stans locker and shit talking him  _

 

_ [dumbass] you and me  _

 

_ [dumbass] mcdonalds parking lot  _

 

_ [dumbass] 15 minutes  _

  
  
  


_ [my love - beautiful boy] _

 

_ [my love] hey stan  _

 

_ [my love] any chance u could come by the police station and bail me and rich out  _

 


	16. The Time When It Got Better

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this really feels like its the end but I SWEAR ITS NOT 
> 
> i got a lot more in store dont worry

_ [beautiful boy - my love] _

 

_ [beautiful boy] WHAT  _ __  
  


_ [beautiful boy] BILL ARE YOU HURT WHAT HAPPENED  _

 

_ [my love] me and richie decided to go fight henry  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] WHY  _

 

_ [my love] cause hes a fucking asshole  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] there needs to be more  _

 

_ [my love] just come to the station ill explain everything  _

  
  


_ [bird boy - eddio]  _

 

_ [bird boy] our boyfriends are idiots  _

 

_ [eddio] been knew  _

 

_ [bird boy] youre staying with richie right  _

 

_ [eddio] yeah  _

 

_ [bird boy] good he can explain to you when we get there  _

 

_ [eddio] explain what  _

 

_ [bird boy] why i just lost $50 to get them out of jail  _

 

_ [eddio] WHAT  _

 

_ [bird boy] they decided to go fight henry and got caught and henry got away _

 

_ [eddio] fuckin christ  _

 

_ [eddio] is richie okay  _

 

_ [bird boy] a few custs and bruises but otherwise hes good  _

 

_ [eddio] and bill  _

 

_ [bird boy] same thing  _

 

_ [bird boy] ill be at richies with them in 3 we can all talk about it there  _

 

_ [eddio] okay  _

  
  


_                                                          [bird - farm] _

 

_ [bird] hey can i like vent to you for a minute  _

 

_ [farm] of course  _

 

_ [bird] bill and richie just got put in jail and i had to bail him out _

 

_ [farm] for what  _

 

_ [bird] he got in a fight with henry  _

 

_ [farm] why  _

 

_ [bird] thats the thing  _

 

_ [bird] he said because henry put a note in eddies bag that got him kicked out  _

 

_ [bird] but i feel like theres something hes not telling me  _

 

_ [farm] like what _

 

_ [bird] well the cops told me that richie was more of a bystander while bill did most of the punching  _

 

_ [bird] we’ve both seen richie when someone goes after eddie but like  _

 

_ [bird] does this make any sense  _

 

_ [farm] stan  _

 

_ [farm] its 3am  _

 

_ [farm] nothing makes sense anymore but  _

 

_ [farm] you should talk to bill  _

 

_ [farm] hes the only one that can tell you about it  _

 

_ [bird] youre right  _

 

_ [bird] thanks mike  _

 

_ [farm] no problem _

 

_ [farm] now go to sleep _

  
  
  
  


_                                                                  [bitchie bill - dumbass]  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] please  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] mercy kill me  _

 

_ [dumbass] why  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i didnt tell stan about henry _

 

_ [dumbass] well i think he knows about the fight he bailed us out  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] not that i meant the shit talking  _

_ [dumbass] oh _

 

_ [dumbass] why  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i dont know man  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] its like i dont want him to get upset over it  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] he thinks hes not perfect and it makes me sad cause he is but he cant see that and if i told him this i feel like i could hurt him  _

 

_ [dumbass] ah the classic should i lie to protect their feelings or tell the truth debate  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] what do i do  _

 

_ [dumbass] your asking the guy whos username is dumbass  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] touche  _

  
  


__

_                     [mom - billiam]  _

 

_ [billiam] bev i need help  _

 

_ [mom] with what  _

 

_ [billiam] long story: henry keeps shit talking stan and putting shit on his locker and he also put the note in eddies bag that got him kicked out and so me and rich went to fight him and we got caught by the cops and stan came and bailed us out and i kinda didnt tell him about the notes on his locker and i feel like hes getting suspicious of me  _

 

_ [mom] wow a lot to unpack there  _

 

_ [mom] why dont you want to tell him  _

 

_ [billiam] i dont want to kick him when hes down _

 

_ [billiam] no thats not what i meant  _

 

_ [billiam] its more like  _

 

_ [mom] no no i get it  _

_ [mom] i think you should talk to him  _

 

_ [billiam] but what if _

 

_ [mom] what if what  _

 

_ [billiam] what if i hurt him even more  _

 

_ [mom] listen man _

 

_ [mom] even if you do i know one thing  _

 

_ [mom] you love stan and he loves you  _

 

_ [mom] you will fucking stand by him this i know  _

 

_ [mom] and he will stand by you  _

 

_ [mom] okay  _

 

_ [billiam] okay  _

 

_ [billiam] also you just referenced my favorite movie  _

 

_ [mom] christ  _

  
  
  


_ [my love - beautiful boy]  _

 

_ [my love] stan theres something ive got to tell you  _

 

_ [my love] its about why i fought henry  _

 

_ [my love] that dickwad has been putting a bunch of notes on your locker and shit talking you _

 

_ [my love] i take the notes down before you get there  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] and why did you keep this from me  _

 

_ [my love] i was scared  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] of what  _

 

_ [my love] of hurting you  _

 

_ [my love] because i love you so much and if you were sad i would never forgive myself  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] bill  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] you could never hurt me  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] and quite frankly  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i dont give a shit what henry thinks  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i only care about 9 people in this world  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] my parents, ben, mike, richie, bev, eddie, georgie and you  _

 

_ [my love] i love you  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i love you too  _

  
  
  


_ [rich - eds<3] _

 

_ [eds<3] why would you go after henry  _

 

_ [rich] he got you kicked out  _

 

_ [eds<3] i got me kicked out  _

 

_ [eds<3] and id much rather be living with my boyfriend  _

 

_ [rich] aw eds you melt my heart  _

 

_ [eds<3] your really an idiot ya know  _

 

_ [rich] ya  _

 

_ [eds<3] but your my idiot  _

 

_ [eds<3] and i love you  _

 

_ [rich] i love you spaghetti man  _


	17. The Time When It Got A Little Meta

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ROOOOOOBE BOYS 
> 
> if you dont know what that is just google it trust me you wont regret it

_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [farm boy] so howd everything work out  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] we got it all sorted out  _

 

_ [softy] ???  _

 

_ [eds] same here  _

 

_ [jesus] good to hear  _

 

_ [softy] ???????? _

 

_ [trashcan] jail fucking sucked tho _

 

_ [billiam] big time _

 

_ [softy] DID I FALL ASLEEP FOR A YEAR WHAT HAPPENED  _

 

_ [billiam] rich and i went to jail  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] i bailed em out  _

 

_ [eds] drama ensued  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] i wouldnt call it drama  _

 

_ [softy] bev mike howd you know  _

 

_ [jesus] bill came to me for advice  _

 

_ [farm boy] and stan to me  _

 

_ [softy] WOW  _

 

_ [softy] BUT NO ONE WANTED TO TELL ME HUH  _

 

_ [softy] why am i always out of the loop  _

 

_ [jesus] aww ben i wanted to tell you but i felt like it wasnt my place  _

 

_ [farm boy] i love you benny  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] ben we love you  _

 

_ [softy] i love you too  _

  
  
  


_                                                               [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [trashcan] guys!!  _

 

_ [trashcan] boris sent me a letter  _

 

_ [billiam] wow old-timey mail  _

 

_ [trashcan] he said  _

 

_ [trashcan] скажи своим друзьям, я с нетерпением жду их встречи _

 

_ [softy] tell your friends i look forward to seeing them again  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] tell boris i prefer him to u  _

 

_ [trashcan] ouch stan that hurts  _

 

_ [eds] tell boris i look forward to seeing him too  _

 

_ [billiam] we stan boris  _

 

_ [jesus] tea  _

 

_ [softy] love you boris  _

 

_ [farm boy] boris is the next great cryptid of the century  _

 

_ [billiam] best vine go  _

 

_ [eds] tWO bRoS cHIlLiNg iN tHe HOtuB 5 fEeT aPaRT cAuSE thEY'rE nOt gAY  _

_ [stan with a plan] father steve does god hate you if your gay  _

 

_ [trashcan] hey my friend thinks your hot  _

 

_ [softy] JEsuS mAN  _

 

_ [farm boy] aRe tHOsE hELiUM bAllOoNS  _

 

_ [jesus] BRING THE BEAT IN  _

 

_ [billiam] rObE bOYS  _

 

_ [jesus] rOOObE bOOySS  _

 

_ [softy] ROBe bOYS  _

 

_ [farm boy] roBe bOOOYYSS  _

 

_ [trashcan] rOOOOBe bOOOOYYS  _

 

_ [eds] rOBe boYS  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] u ever notice how those people kind of look like us _

 

_ [billiam] i have no idea what your talking about  _

 

_ [eds] and the ‘hey my friend thinks your hot’ guy kid of looks like young richie  _

 

_ [softy] AND HOW ONE OF THE ROBE BOYS GUYS LOOKS LIKE THAT GUY _

 

_ [farm boy] ITS ALL CONNECTED  _

 

_ [trashcan] OOoooOOooooOOoOoooooOoOoOOOoooooooooOOOOOOO  _

 

_ [jesus] CONSPIRACY  _

 

_ [eds] some call shane and ryan weve got a conspiracy on our hands  _

 

_ [trashcan] who would be who if we were bfu  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] im shane thats facts  _

 

_ [jesus] canon  _

_ [eds] im ryan  _

 

_ [trashcan] im the demon  _

 

_ [softy] hEY tHeRE dEMoNs iTS mE YOuR boY  _

 

_ [billiam] your RObe bOYS  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] not again  _

  
  


_                                                                     [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [jesus] losers club assemble  _

 

_ [jesus] its party time _

 

_ [stan with a plan] leg  _

 

_ [billiam] come over we can play cards with georgie  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] oo can we watch thanksgiving charlie brown  _

 

_ [billiam] of course  _

 

_ [jesus] okay now that those two are squared away _

 

_ [jesus] whos coming  _

 

_ [eds] ill go  _

 

_ [trashcan] im always up for a party  _

 

_ [softy] ill go wherever babe  _

 

_ [farm boy] ive got a saturday evening to kill lets go  _

 

_ [jesus] oh mike buddy  _

 

_ [farm boy] what _

 

_ [stan with a plan] its monday bud  _

 

_ [farm boy] HOW  _

 

_ [farm boy] DID I SLEEP THROUGH ALL OF SUNDAY  _

 

_ [trashcan] AHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAH _

 

_ [farm boy] dont laugh at me richie  _

 

_ [jesus] meet at my place  _

  
  
  


_                                                             [eds <3 - rich]  _

 

_ [eds<3] chee where are u  _

 

_ [eds<3] i thought we agreed we would stay together  _

 

_ [eds<3] chee  _

 

_ [eds<3] rich  _

 

_ [eds<3] richie where are you  _

 


	18. The Time When They Broke Up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you asked for angst 
> 
> so here you go

_   [eds <3 - rich]  _

 

_ [eds<3] u know what rich  _

 

_ [eds<3] we’re done  _

 

_ [eds<3] i cant believe that you would do that seriously  _

 

_ [eds<3] dont even bother helping me get my stuff  _

 

_ [eds<3] id rather be with sonia than u asshole  _

 

__

__ **_eds <3 has changed rich’s name to: asshole _ **

  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

  
  


__ **_eds has removed trashcan from the chat_ **

 

_ [eds] guess who’s officially homeless again  _

 

_ [jesus] whyd u remove rich  _

 

_ [softy] why are u homeless  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] i mean im all for richies departure but why  _

 

_ [eds] asshole fucking cheated on me  _

 

_ [eds] dont want to talk about it _

 

_ [stan with a plan] wanna live with me _

 

_ [eds] would your parents care  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] no _

 

_ [jesus] shit eddie im sorry  _

 

_ [farm boy] i cant fucking believe it man that sucks  _

 

_ [billiam] im really sorry is there anything i can do  _

 

_ [eds] not really bill but i appreciate the offer  _

  
  


__

_                                                              [bitchie bill - dumbass]  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] LISTEN UP MOTHERFUCKER  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] SO YOU REALLY DID THAT TO MY BEST FRIEND HUH  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] AFTER I HELPED GET U TOGETHER  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] YOU DO THIS TO HIM  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] YOUR FUCKING UNBELIEVABLE  _

 

_ [dumbass] bill  _

 

_ [dumbass] u got to believe me please  _

 

_ [dumbass] i was super fucking drunk and was forced into it  _

 

_ [dumbass] hes blowing it way out of preportion  _

 

_ [dumbass] the chick was on top of me i had no decision in the matter  _

 

_ [dumbass] she didnt even kiss me i swear but i never wanted her anywhere near me  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] thats the thing rich  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i cant believe you  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i dont know if your lying to preserve our friendship or what but i dont know  _

 

_ [dumbass] bill please  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] until i figure it out dont talk to me  _

  
  
  


_                                                        [staniel - idiot]  _

 

_ [staniel] woooooooooooooow it be like that then huh  _

 

_ [idiot] come on stan you gotta believe me  _

 

_ [idiot] i didnt do it i swear to god  _

 

_ [staniel] sure  _

 

_ [idiot] no man please im serious  _

 

_ [idiot] it wasnt me i wasnt like oh fuck yeah lets go it was all them  _

 

_ [idiot] and nothing even happened  _

 

_ [staniel] sorry rich  _

 

__

__

_                                                             [richie - benny boy]  _

 

_ [richie] benny _

 

_ [richie] i never wanted that and nothing happened  _

 

_ [richie] please ben  _

 

_ [richie] you gotta believe me  _

 

_ [benny] i dont believe that you did that to eddie  _

 

_ [benny] you love him and that doesnt sound like you  _

 

_ [richie] so do you trust me  _

 

_ [benny] of course  _

 

_ [benny] i love u :)  _

 

_ [richie] thank you ben ily2  _

  
  
  
  


_                                                                 [scary - a bi mistake] _

 

_ [scary] i dont believe u  _

 

_ [a bi mistake] excuse me  _

 

_ [scary] i dont think you cheated on eddie  _

 

_ [scary] you love him too much  _

 

_ [scary] also its quite unbelievable that someone would want to fuck u  _

 

_ [a bi mistake] we werent fucking  _

 

_ [a bi mistake] i was crazy drunk cause when i party i party hard  _

 

_ [a bi mistake] out of nowhere this chick comes over and like insists on siting on me and im like nah get out i have a boyfriend and then before i know it eds in in there and hes crying and then i blacked out _

 

_ [scary] jesus christ richie  _

 

_ [scary] ill try to talk to eddie because it making me sad  _

 

_ [scary] also stan will not be able to have someone else in his space  _

 

_ [a bi mistake] eds is staying with stan _

 

_ [scary] yeah  _

 

_ [a bi mistake] no stans not gonna last a week  _


	19. The Time When They Made Up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wasnt gonna post today cause i already posted another fic but whatever 
> 
> you know whats even better than angst 
> 
> slllllooooowww buurrn

_  [softest bby - loml]  _

 

_ [softest bby] bev we have to do something  _

 

_ [softest bby] richie wouldnt cheat on eddie  _

 

_ [loml] youre right i dont think he would  _

 

_ [softest bby] should we talk to eddie  _

 

_ [loml] can u  _

 

_ [loml] im scared hed yell at me  _

 

_ [softest bby] of course  _

 

_ [loml] i love you  _

 

_ [softest bby] i love you too  _

  
  
  


_                                                          [benny - spaghetti]  _

 

_ [benny] hey eddie how are u  _

 

_ [spaghetti] im okay  _

 

_ [benny] i talked to richie  _

 

_ [spaghetti] jesus christ  _

 

_ [benny] hear me out  _

 

_ [benny] i think u should hear richie out  _

 

_ [benny] just listen to his side of the story  _

 

_ [spaghetti] he’ll just lie to me  _

 

_ [benny] eddie  _

 

_ [benny] has richie ever lied to u  _

 

_ [spaghetti] no but this is different  _

 

_ [spaghetti] this isnt lying because he ate the last cookie this is some serious shit  _

 

_ [benny] richie cares about u too much  _

 

_ [spaghetti] thank you ben  _

 

_ [benny] anything for u friend :) _

 

_ [spaghetti] ben wait  _

 

_ [benny] yeah  _

 

_ [spaghetti] what do i say  _

 

_ [spaghetti] how do i not just start yelling at him  _

 

_ [benny] remain calm always  _

 

_ [benny] just breathe dont start yelling whatever you do it will only make it worse and you might end up saying something youll regret  _

 

_ [spaghetti] i might have already done that part  _

 

_ [benny] okay we can deal with that after just try and get his side of the story  _

 

_ [spaghetti] alright  _

  
  
  
  


_ [eds - asshole]  _

 

_ [eds] richie  _

 

_ [eds] im sorry for kind of loosing my temper  _

 

_ [eds] could u tell me your side of the story cause i probably dont have the facts  _

 

_ [eds] and you did still have your fucking shirt on so it wasnt as worse as it could have been  _

 

_ [asshole] i was drunk cause its me  _

 

_ [eds] i assumed this wasnt a sober decision _

 

_ [asshole] i was sitting down on the couch and then this girl comes up to me and shes like hitting on me and im like nope im in a relationship and shes like oh come on and im like nope my boyfriend would murder me and then the next thing i know shes leading me up to a room and i went along cause i thought it was bev and then she like climbs on me and then you came in and started crying and then i got upset and blacked out  _

 

_ [eds] woah  _

 

_ [eds] im happy that you thought about me  _

 

_ [asshole] i never dont think about you  _

 

_ [asshole] can u change my name back then  _

 

_ [eds] yeah but first i just want to say something  _

 

_ [asshole] the floor is all your eds  _

 

_ [eds] i dont think we should get back together right away  _

 

_ [eds] the way i was so quick to assume that you had cheated on me it made me think about things  _

 

_ [eds] i think we should take a break  _

 

_ [asshole] i mean  _

 

_ [asshole] i respect your decision  _

 

_ [eds] thank you  _

  
  


**_eds has changed asshole’s name to: rich_ **

  
  


_ [eds] im surprised at how mature you were during that  _

 

_ [rich] i know right  _

  
  
  
  


_                                                          [the loserz club]  _

 

**_eds has added trashcan to the chat_ **

 

_ [trashcan] have you missed me  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] i liked it better when he was gone  _

 

_ [billiam] me too  _

 

_ [trashcan] ouch  _

 

_ [softy] so what happened  _

 

_ [eds] we worked it out  _

 

_ [farm boy] yay the second best couple is back  _

 

_ [farm boy] first will never be revealed  _

 

_ [eds] were not back together  _

 

_ [jesus] wait what  _

 

_ [eds] we decided that we should take a break  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] so are u gonna still live with me  _

 

_ [eds] im still need to figure that out  _

 

_ [eds] cause i know u hate having people in your space  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] it’s fine u can stay  _

 

_ [eds] thanks stan i owe u one  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] dont mention it _

  
  
  


_                                                             [idiot - staniel]  _

 

_ [idiot] are u sure about that  _

 

_ [staniel] ???? _

 

_ [idiot] having eds at your place  _

 

_ [staniel] yeah its fine  _

 

_ [idiot] are u suuuuuurree  _

 

_ [staniel] yes richie  _

 

_ [staniel] you just want eddie to go back with u  _

 

_ [idiot] no  _

 

_ [staniel] i bet u didnt want to take a break  _

 

_ [idiot] of course i didnt but i dont want to say no to him  _

 

_ [idiot] i respect his decision even tho it was bullshit  _

 

_ [staniel] so tell him  _

 

_ [staniel] its all about communication  _

 

_ [idiot] …  _

  
  


__

_  [edDIE - billy]  _

 

_ [edDIE] hey bill  _

 

_ [edDIE] i fucked up  _

 

_ [billy] what did u do now  _

 

_ [edDIE] i told richie i wanted to take a break  _

 

_ [billy] so did u not want that  _

 

_ [edDIE] no of course not i just got flustered and panicked  _

 

_ [billy] well eddie u should tell him  _

 

_ [edDIE] but but  _

 

_ [edDIE] hell be like then why did you say u wanted a break  _

 

_ [edDIE] or maybe hes moved on  _

 

_ [edDIE] maybe hes already with someone else  _

 

_ [billy] literally listen to yourself  _

 

_ [billy] richie could never move on from u  _


	20. The Time With Bill Nye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL 
> 
> (also i forgot to mention bill is pan)

_ [stan - bill - richie]  _

  
  


_ [stan] richie me and bill were talking and we just want to say that we’re sorry  _

 

_ [bill] neither of us believed you and that was fuckin dumb  _

 

_ [bill] i just went in all angry and i didnt think it through  _

 

_ [bill] i said some things i regret and im really sorry  _

 

_ [stan] yeah rich i was a really shitty friend i should have listen to u  _

 

_ [richie] guys its okay  _

 

_ [richie] i dont really know if id believe me either  _

 

_ [stan] no richie its really not  _

 

_ [stan] im really sorry  _

 

_ [stan] im supposed to be your best friend and i didnt even believe u when u told me  _

 

_ [stan] could u find it to forgive me  _

 

_ [richie] of course stan without u id be lost  _

 

_ [bill] that makes two  _

 

_ [stan] thanks  _

 

_ [stan] means a lot  _

  
  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] do u ever just  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] ezra miller  _

 

_ [billiam] i dont know what that means but yes  _

 

_ [eds] honestly i fuckin love him  _

 

_ [trashcan] tea  _

 

_ [jesus] WHAT AN ICON  _

 

_ [farm boy] we stan  _

 

_ [softy] SJKKKKKKERFHBDGJDSKA _

 

_ [softy] HE  _

 

_ [farm boy] u broke ben  _

 

_ [eds] can we talk about patrick in perks for a minute tho  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] we should never not be talking about patrick  _

 

_ [eds] uh and charlie  _

 

_ [trashcan] uhh dont even im gonna start crying  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] woah richie expressed emotions  _

 

_ [trashcan] u know what stan  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] what  _

 

_ [trashcan] i dont know i didnt get that far  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] thats what i thought coward  _

 

_ [billiam] oh shit stan ilysm  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] i love u so much  _

 

_ [billiam] i love u more  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] i love u more _

 

_ [billiam] i love u more  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] i am 3 inches taller than u therefore I have more love capacity in my body i love u more  _

 

_ [farm boy] oh shit he busted out SCIENCE  _

 

_ [trashcan] BILL NYE THE SCIENCE GUY  _

 

_ [eds] BILL BILL BILL BILL BILLL  _

 

**stan with a plan has changed billiam’s name to: bill nye the science guy**

 

_ [stan with a plan] BILL NYE THE SCIENCE GUY  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] SCIENCE RULES  _

 

_ [farm boy] what  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] bill nye  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] science genius  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] kind of my childhood  _

 

_ [farm boy] homeschooled  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] goddamnit mike  _

 

_ [stan with a plan]  come over theyre all on netflix  _

 

_ [farm boy] omw  _

  
  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [trashcan] stan takes out the trash  _

 

_ [trashcan] stan with a can  _

 

_ [eds] stan goes to aruba  _

 

_ [eds] stan with a tan _

 

_ [softy] stan gets a bf _

 

_ [softy] stan with a man  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] stan hangs out with me  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] stan with a pan  _

 

_ [farm boy] everyone go home bill won  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] ….  _

 

_ [stan with plan] yeah bill wins  _

 

_ [trashcan] your biased  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] im surprised u even knew how to spell that _

 

_ [eds] me too  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] wrong form of youre tho  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] u should have used youre because im not possesing the biased i am biased  _

 

_ [trashcan] you know what  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] stop making empty threats u coward _

 

_ [farm boy] stop calling each other cowards for fucks sake  _

 

_ [farm boy] chill the fuck out  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] mike has spoken  _

 

_ [trashcan] all hail lord mike  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] all hail  _

 

_ [softy] how do i convey hailing over text  _

 

_ [eds] i have no idea  _

 

_ [jesus] can we watch perks next movie night  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] yes and next movie night is now everyone at my place for some movie excellence  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] this is gotg erasure  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] well watch gotg1 after  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] yay  _

  
  



	21. The Time When They Discussed A4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AVENGERS IW SPOILERS 
> 
> okay so the end part is me being salty about getting snow this early in november

_ [rich - eds<3]  _

  
  


_ [rich] hey eds can we talk  _

 

_ [eds] yeah sure rich  _

 

_ [rich] christmas is coming  _

 

_ [rich] what do u want  _

 

_ [eds] rich u dont have to get me anything  _

 

_ [rich] no eddie your my second best friend im buying u something  _

 

_ [eds] i dont need anything  _

 

_ [rich] well do u want anything  _

 

_ [eds] no  _

 

_ [rich] u have to want something  _

 

_ [eds] really rich im fine  _

  
  
  
  
  


_ [idiot - staniel]  _

 

_ [idiot] stannneeeyyy  _

 

_ [staniel] what  _

 

_ [idiot] i messed up  _

 

_ [staniel] christ what did u do now  _

 

_ [idiot] remember how you told me to tell eds i wanted to get back together  _

 

_ [staniel] you mean yesterday???  _

 

_ [idiot] well i kinda was about to and then chickened out and asked him what he wanted for christmas _

 

_ [staniel] in the beginning of november??????  _

 

_ [idiot] yeah….  _

 

_ [staniel] thats okay rich  _

 

_ [staniel] its not easy just build up your courage  _

 

_ [staniel] maybe talking in person would help  _

 

_ [staniel] like last time  _

 

_ [idiot] well this different then last time  _

 

_ [idiot] last time it was just us not this looming cloud of cheating _

 

_ [staniel] u didnt cheat  _

 

_ [idiot] yeah but it was my fault we got torn apart  _

 

_ [idiot] i was the one who got crazy stupid drunk and almost made out with someone else  _

 

_ [staniel] yeah but you didnt  _

 

_ [staniel] u totally got this  _

 

_ [staniel] if u want to do it in person me and bill could tag along  _

 

_ [idiot] and why would i want that  _

 

_ [staniel] so like if it gets awkward we’re there  _

 

_ [idiot] fair point  _

  
  


_ [edDIE - billy]  _

 

_ [edDIE] uh bill  _

 

_ [billy] uh eddie  _

 

_ [edDIE] richie asked me what i wanted for christmas and all i wanted to say was him  _

 

_ [billy] well say it then  _

 

_ [billy] dont be a coward u got this  _

 

_ [edDIE] yeah but thats too obvious  _

 

_ [billy] isnt it supposed to be  _

 

_ [edDIE] bill i cant just jump back in  _

 

_ [billy] i know u cant see me but know im rolling my eyes  _

 

_ [edDIE] stan has had too much of an influence on u  _

 

_ [billy] maybe thats a good thing ;)  _

 

_ [edDIE] ew  _

 

_ [billy] ur just jealous ;)  _

 

_ [edDIE] good bye bill  _

 

_ [billy] ;)  _

  
  
  


_ [my love - beautiful boy]  _

 

_ [my love] hey  _

 

_ [my love] wanna come over  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] im watching bill nye with mike and eddie  _

 

_ [my love] and you didnt invite me???!?!!?!? _

 

_ [beautiful boy] come on over  _

 

_ [my love] and then when they leave ;)  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] you do realize that eddie lives with me right  _

 

_ [my love] damn  _

 

_ [my love] tmr  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] come over now  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] plleeaseeee _

 

_ [my love] im on my way cutie  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] yay! _

  
  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [jesus] when people say that peter p is tonys only son i get mad  _

 

_ [softy] HARLEY ERASURE  _

 

_ [eds] harley is a real one  _

 

_ [farm boy] hes so fucking cute i want to protect him from this cruel world  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] if he dies in a4 i will be so fucking mad  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] what if harley got snapped and hes in the soul relam with peter _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] and tony finds out and hes like ‘i lost both my sciencelings’  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] bill :(  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] bby im sorry  _

 

_ [trashcan] what if thanos got snapped and thats why he has that weird thing with tiny gamora  _

 

_ [jesus] RICHIE YOUR BRILLIANT  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] *youre  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] AND THATS WHY HE LOOKS OVER THAT OTHER PLANET CAUSE THATS THE SOUL RELAM  _

 

_ [softy] MR STARK  _

 

_ [farm boy] IM SHOOK  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] hate to be the bearer of bad news but after he sees gamora hes back with thor and then he portals out to probably an old version of titan  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] oh  _

 

_ [eds] u know how theyre supposed to go back in time  _

 

_ [trashcan] yeah  _

 

_ [eds] what if when they go back in time steve decides he wants to stay with peggy in the 40s and thats when he gives the shield  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] woulnt that alter the timeline too much  _

 

_ [eds] no because everything that cevans cap has done becomes bucky cap  _

 

_ [eds] so like bucky cap fought in new york brought down hydra and all that  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] but what about civil war  _

 

_ [eds] there is no civil war  _

 

_ [eds] avengers are still together  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] holy shit  _

 

_ [trashcan] EDDIE YOUR A FUCKING GENIUS  _

 

_ [farm boy] what are you a cop or some shit where the hell did that come from  _

 

_ [eds] my incredibly huge brain  _

 

_ [trashcan] u know what else is incredibly huge _

 

_ [stan with a plan] CHRIST  _

 

_ [trashcan] my love for u as a friend  _

 

_ [eds] oh? _

 

_ [trashcan] AND MY DICK  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] there it is  _

  
  
  


_ [the loserz club] _

  
  


_ [stan with a plan] put this fucking snow back where it came from or some help me GOD  _

 

_ [eds] no! christmas time is here!  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] jewish  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] AND WE HAVENT EVEN HAD THANKSGIVING YET  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] THIS IS THANKSGIVING ERASURE  _

 

_ [trashcan] im with eds  _

 

_ [farm boy] ya cause your fucking whipped richie  _

 

_ [farm boy] let us having thanksgiving in peace _

 

_ [softy] #stoperasingthanksgiving  _

 

_ [jesus] THANKSGIVING IS THE ONLY REAL ONE  _

  
  



	22. The Time When Richie Got A Plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FANTASTIC BEASTS CRIMES OF GRINDLEWALD SPOILERS!!!! 
> 
> can someone please make stan as newt fanart thanks 
> 
> also christmas music is the perfect serenade so look forward to that 
> 
> i think i might end this series soon because im running out of ideas for plot

_ [richie rich - benny]  _

 

_ [richie rich] benny boy i have a question   _

 

_ [benny] shoot  _

 

_ [richie rich] how do i tell eds i wanna get back together  _

 

_ [benny] you do?!!!!??  _

 

_ [richie rich] yeah yeah  _

 

_ [benny] that’s so great  _

 

_ [benny] u should just tell him  _

 

_ [benny] YOU SHOULD SING HIM ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS U  _

 

_ [richie rich] it’s november????? _

 

_ [benny] yeah but Christmas is close  _

 

_ [richie rich] you u literally were just yelling at me for forgetting thanksgiving  _

 

_ [benny] go to his window and sing the song  _

 

_ [benny] itd be adorable  _

 

_ [richie rich] stan would be there  _

 

_ [benny] get bill to take stan out of the equation and then do it  _

 

_ [benny] it’s already snowing  _

 

_ [richie rich] ill think about it  _

  
  
  


_ [my gay son - mom 2] _

 

_ [my gay son] bev _

 

_ [mom 2] eddie  _

 

_ [my gay son] i want to get back together with rich _

 

_ [mom 2] !!!!!!! _

 

_ [my gay son] ive been thinking about it and i really just want to be back with him _

 

_ [mom 2] JUST TELL HIM  _

 

_ [mom 2} dont make it more complicated than it has to be  _

 

_ [my gay son] what do i even say  _

 

_ [mom 2] richie i wanna get back together  _

 

_ [my gay son] yeah but  _

 

_ [mom 2] but????  _

 

_ [my gay son] uh why did we even break up in the first place  _

 

_ [mom 2] well u thought he cheated on u  _

 

_ [my gay son] DONT REMIND ME  _

 

_ [my gay son] its all my fault uhhhh i hate myself  _

 

_ [mom 2] EDWARD KASPBRAK  _

 

_ [mom 2] ITS NOT YOUR FAULT AND ITS NOT RICHIES EITHER ITS THIS CRUEL UNIVERSE WE LIVE IN BUT YOU EDDIE CAN BEAT IT IF YOU GET BACK WITH HIM DO YOU UNDERSTAND  _

 

_ [my gay son] woah  _

  
  
  


_ [the loserz club] _

  
  


_ [trashcan] important question: too early for christmas music or no  _

 

_ [jesus] depends which music we talking here  _

 

_ [jesus] pop ones or the classics _

 

_ [trashcan] all i want for christmas  _

 

_ [jesus] hmmm  _

 

_ [softy] nope not too early play it now  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] nope dont too early must wait until december 1st  _

 

_ [trashcan] THATS SO FAR OFF I NEED IT NOW  _

 

_ [jesus] why  _

 

_ [trashcan] uh  _

 

_ [eds] i dont think its too early  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] depends on the person  _

 

_ [farm boy] HELLO YES I HAVE JUST RETURNED FROM FANTASTIC BEASTS 2 AND ALL I CAN SAY IS HOLY SHIT _

 

_ [stan with a plan] I KNOW RIGHT  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] AND CREDENCE GOOD LORD I CANT BELIEVE HES A DUMBLEDORE  _

 

_ [trashcan] WHAT SPOILERS  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] AND QUEENIE _

 

_ [jesus] UH DONT REMIND ME I CRIED IN THE THEATER  _

 

_ [eds] SHHHH SPOILERS  _

 

_ [softy] dumbledore was pretty gay _

 

_ [trashcan] eds come over we’re seeing it now  _

 

_ [eds] omw  _

 

_ [farm boy] DUMBLEDORE WAS SO FUCKING GAY HOLY SHIT  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] WE WERE MORE THAN BROTHERS MY ASS  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] ;)  _

 

_ [jesus] AND NAGINI  _

 

_ [farm boy] POOR JACOB  _

 

_ [farm boy] I WAS CRYING WHEN QUEENIE LEFT HIM  _

 

_ [stan with a plan] lowkey i kinda hate queenie now  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] lowkey me too  _

_ [stan with a plan] I WOULD DIE FOR NEWT SCAMANDER THIS IS A FACT  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] babe lowkey you remind me of him  _

 

_ [farm boy] holy shit your right  _

 

_ [farm boy] the hair the love of animals  _

 

_ [softy] STAN IS NEWT HOLY SHIT  _

 

_ [jesus] next years halloween please be newt  _

 

**_jesus has changed stan with a plan’s name to: newt_ **

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] can i be tina  _

 

_ [softy] CAN I BE JACOB  _

 

_ [farm boy] BEN IS JACOB  _

 

_ [jesus] HE REALLY IS  _

 

_ [farm boy] am i credence  _

 

_ [jesus] eddie is nagini ad richie is credence  _

 

_ [jesus] mike your a niffler _

 

_ [newt] MIKE IS DUMBLEDORE  _

  
  
  


_ [dumbass - bitchie bill]  _

 

_ [dumbass] any chance you could get stan out of his house tmr  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] excuse me?  _

 

_ [dumbass] im gonna serenade eddie with christmas music to get him back and i dont want your dumb bf there filming me  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] how dare u call my bf dumb _

 

_ [bitchie bill] but also  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] what time and how long  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] theres this restuarant i want to take him to  _

 

_ [dumbass] aw  _

 

_ [dumbass] probably like 6:30  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] ill ask him and make a reservation  _

 

_ [dumbass] look at u  _

 

_ [dumbass] being all mature n shit  _

  
  


_ [my love - beautiful boy]] _

 

_ [my love] wanna go out to dinner tmr at a restaurant at like 6:30  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] gotta study for the test imma fail  _

 

_ [my love] lies your gonna ace that test  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] your only saying that cause you love me and love has made you dumb  _

 

_ [my love] i disagree  _

 

_ [my love] remember last week when i boiled that egg  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] that was big i was proud of you  _

 

_ [my love] moral of the story _

 

_ [my love] you dont need to study cause your gonna ace that test so u should go out to dinner with me  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] alright we can go  _

 

_ [my love] ily  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] ily2   _

 


	23. The Time When Bill Ordered A Floral Suit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi bill and stan in floral suits is a concept i deserve thanks for coming to my ted talk 
> 
> also sorry this was such a stenbrough heavy chapter its just theyre my lane and i would die for them 
> 
> oh and this might be the last update for this week cause thanksgiving and all that sorry

_ [dumbass - bitchie bill] _

  
  


_ [dumbass] hey bill could u come over before you go out with stan  _

 

_ [dumbass] i wanna make sure my guitar chords are good  _

 

_ [dumbass] i havent played in a while  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] im sure there fine _

 

_ [bitchie bill] but ill come over  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i need help deciding what to wear  _

 

_ [dumbass] do i look like a teenage girl to u  _

 

_ [dumbass] i wear hawaiian shirts and i havent showered in a week i cant help u  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] 1. gross ur showering before u serenade eddie  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] 2. i have it narrowed down to two outfits i just need to know which one is better  _

 

_ [dumbass] how fancy is the restaurant  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] 4 star  _

 

_ [dumbass] okaaaaayyy  _

 

_ [dumbass] but like ive seen mcdonalds with 4 stars your gonna need to be more specific  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] white tablecloths and fancy champagne glasses for drinks  _

 

_ [dumbass] daaaaaaaaaaammn bill  _

 

_ [dumbass] really pulled out all the stops huh  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] can u just help me decide what to wear  _

 

_ [dumbass] ill do u one better  _

 

_ [dumbass] u help me get ready i help you _

 

_ [bitchie bill] deal  _

 

_ [dumbass] whyd u go so fancy  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i dont know  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] its just this is kinda like our first official date  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] up to this point its just been movie nights and playing games with georgie  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] so when u asked me to take stan out i thought id just take him out on the best date ever  _

 

_ [dumbass] how adorable  _

 

_ [dumbass] now hurry up weve only got 3 hours  _

  
  
  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

  
  


_ [bill nye the science guy] hey gang should i buy one of those floral suits _

 

_ [newt] YES YES PLEASE OH DEAR LORD PLEASE  _

 

_ [newt] BUY IT AND WEAR IT TONIGHT PLEASE I BEG OF U  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] it would be through the internet so it wouldnt be here today  _

 

_ [jesus] i 1000% support this but u have to wear eyeshadow with it  _

 

_ [newt] HOLY SHIT PLEASE  _

 

_ [eds] and paint your nails  _

 

_ [trashcan] curl your hair  _

 

_ [farm boy] yall are gonna kill stan  _

 

_ [newt] too late im already dead  _

 

_ [softy] this just in bill is now dating a ghost, more at 6  _

 

_ [trashcan] bEnNy bOI gEtS oFF a GoOd oNe  _

 

_ [eds] oh god  _

 

_ [eds] no one make a joke  _

 

_ [newt] with richie here everything is a joke  _

 

_ [trashcan] sTanIeL gETS oFF a gOod oNe  _

 

_ [newt] fuck  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] everyone ignore richie  _

 

_ [farm boy] wont be a problem _

 

_ [trashcan] MiKEy gEtS OfF a GOoD oNE  _

 

_ [eds] ….  _

  
  
  


_ [beautiful boy - my love]  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] on the real tho  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] please do all of those things  _

 

_ [my love] i have an idea  _

 

_ [my love] when the semi formal happens u and i should go and we can wear the floral suits and eyeshadow  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] bill we live in maine  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] its not exactly progressive city up here  _

 

_ [my love] u know what fuck them  _

 

_ [my love] were gonna wear those floral suits and eyeshadow and so what  _

 

_ [my love] the fuck are they gonna do  _

 

_ [my love] beat me up?  _

 

_ [my love] i wish them luck  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] if they even try to lay a hand on you i swear to god they will never see the light of day ever again  _

 

_ [my love] woah _

 

_ [my love] calm down it was a joke but i appreciate u standing up for me  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] anything for u  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] also  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] u do realize its called the semi formal for a reason  _

 

_ [my love] well be the best dressed couple at the semi formal  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i love your optimism  _

 

_ [my love] so stanley uris  _

 

_ [my love] will you attend the semi formal with me so we can dress up and look like harry styles  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] of course  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] also becoming harry styles has been a constant dream of mine so thank you  _

 

_ [my love] what can i say  _

 

_ [my love] i make dreams come true  _

 

_ [my love] also ill be at your place in 5 minutes to pick u up  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] okay  _

  
  


_ [rich - eds<3]  _

 

_ [rich] hey eddie come to the window  _

 

_ [eds<3] oh god  _

 

_ [eds<3] what did you do to stans house  _

 

_ [eds<3] why do you have your guitar  _

 

_ [eds<3] is this mariah carey?????  _


	24. The Time When Stan Disappeared

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *chanting* angst angst angst angst angst 
> 
> u asked for it and i got it 
> 
> (get ready for some arguing in the stenbrough household next time)

_ [my love - beautiful boy]  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] stan u should come over even tho we just saw each other 30 minutes ago _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i miss u bb _

 

_ [beautiful boy] stan?  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] babe?  _

  
  


__

_ [billy - edDIE]  _

 

_ [billy] hey eddie did stan make it home okay  _

 

_ [billy] hes not responding to my texts and i just wanted to make sure he was okay  _

 

_ [edDIE] thought he was with u  _

 

_ [billy] no i dropped him off at his house like 30 minutes ago  _

 

_ [edDIE] i havent seen him _

 

_ [edDIE] but ive also got something to tell u  _

 

_ [billy] what? _

 

_ [edDIE] me and rich are back together _

 

_ [billy] the power of mariah carey  _

 

_ [edDIE] how did u  _

 

_ [billy] richies been freaking out to me all day  _

 

_ [edDIE] it was super cute  _

 

_ [edDIE] after i invited him up  _

 

_ [billy] eww did u two fuck on stans bed  _

 

_ [edDIE] what?? no!!!  _

 

_ [edDIE] we talked  _

 

_ [billy] im happy for u two  _

  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] has anyone seen stan  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] i dropped him off at his house after our date but eddie said he never saw him  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] hes not responding to my calls or texts  _

 

_ [softy] what do we do  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] should we wait until tmr just to see if he turns up  _

 

_ [eds] i guess  _

 

_ [trashcan] the police wont take us seriously until hes been missing for 48 hours  _

 

_ [farm boy] no one ask richie how he knows that  _

 

_ [trashcan] my cousins friend went missing once  _

 

_ [trashcan] funny story he was kidnapped by an interdimensional monster  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] okay richie story time later  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] planning now  _

 

_ [jesus] tmr morning we all go to bills house and if stan doesnt show by 3pm we start a search  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] that sounds like a good plan  _

  
  
  
  


_ [bitchie bill - dumbass]  _

  
  


_ [bitchie bill] dude what should i do _

 

_ [bitchie bill] should i like continue texting and calling him  _

 

_ [dumbass] i dont know  _

 

_ [dumbass] hes probably fine  _

 

_ [dumbass] maybe he went to get groceries  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] at 11:30 at night? _

 

_ [dumbass] okay maybe thats not the scenario but the point is  _

 

_ [dumbass] hes fine _

 

_ [dumbass] go to sleep  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] how the hell am i supposed to sleep when stan is missing  _

 

_ [dumbass] stans not missing hes just misplaced  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] thats literally a synonym for missing  _

 

_ [dumbass] im just trying to help man  _

  
  


_ [chee<3 - eds<3]  _

  
  


_ [chee<3] so uh im really not helping bill calm down what should i do _

 

_ [eds<3] well what did u say  _

 

_ [chee<3] that he should go to sleep and that stan was just misplaced not missing  _

 

_ [eds<3] babe those words mean the exact same thing  _

 

_ [eds<3] and hes not gonna sleep  _

 

_ [eds<3] let me try  _

  
  
  
  


_ [edDIE - billy] _

  
  


_ [edDIE] its gonna be fine _

 

_ [edDIE] hes gonna turn up tmr  _

 

_ [edDIE] i cant tell u how many time ive thought richie went missing only for him to show up the next day  _

 

_ [billy] i know hes gonna be fine im just worried about where he is  _

 

_ [billy] its 11:40 at night its not very safe out  _

 

_ [edDIE] hes probably just bird watching  _

 

_ [edDIE] he keeps ranting to me about how he never gets to see any of the nocturnal birds cause hes always asleep  _

 

_ [edDIE] he probably saw one and decided to stay out watching them  _

 

_ [billy] very in character  _

 

_ [billy] much better than richies grocery theory  _

 

_ [edDIE] grocery shopping?? at 11:40 at night?  _

 

_ [billy] thats what i said _


	25. The Time When Stan Broke His Nose

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im double posting today cause i cant tmr and ill be too tired on friday and i don’t wanna leave yall on a cliffhanger like that 
> 
> stenbrough angst is my fuckin jam so expect so much more (i would never break them up tho cause thats too far)

_ [the loserz club]  _

  
  


_ [newt] dont search im here  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] stan its 1 where were u  _

 

_ [newt] kicking ass  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] are u spider man _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] am i mj???? _

 

_ [newt] u would be deadpool _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] fuck yeah  _

 

_ [trashcan] wouldnt i be deadpool  _

 

_ [newt] ur not a part of this rich  _

 

_ [newt] but yeah youd be dp  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] :( _

 

_ [newt] youd both be dp  _

 

_ [eds] can i be spiderman too  _

 

_ [newt] yes  _

 

_ [softy] if u arent a superhero why were u kicking ass  _

 

_ [newt] justice needed to be served  _

 

_ [farm boy] ooo who got served a fresh hot plate of justice  _

 

_ [newt] henry  _

 

_ [eds] good christ what is with this group and fighting henry it never goes well  _

  
  


_ [my love - beautiful boy]  _

  
  


_ [my love] stan why the hell would you do that  _

 

_ [my love] if u wanted to fight him u should have called me for back up  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i had it under control  _

 

_ [my love] did u win  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] depends on who u ask  _

 

_ [my love] are u hurt  _

 

_ [my love] please dont be hurt  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i have a black eye and i think my nose is broken  _

 

_ [my love] you think?!?!?????!?!!! _

 

_ [beautiful boy] eddie thinks it is  _

 

_ [my love] how bad was it  _

 

_ [my love] like end of rambo bad or like a childrens action movie  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] for him or me  _

 

_ [my love] both  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i hit him a few times  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] by the end he looked like cap during that one part of ws  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] when theyre on the helicarrier thing and buckys like having an identity crisis   _

 

_ [my love] okay and u  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] the corpse in stand by me  _

 

_ [my love] im coming over to ur place  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] please dont  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] its fine really  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] eddies here  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i walked through the door and he screamed and threw 8 bandages of various sizes at me  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i have no idea where he even found them  _

 

_ [my love] on brand for eddie  _

 

_ [my love] i wanna come over and see how u are  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] im fine  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] eddies already freaking out i dont need u freaking out too  _

 

_ [my love] i wouldnt freak out  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] my nose is broken  _

 

_ [my love] OH SO IT REALLY IS BROKEN OKAY  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] see  _

 

_ [my love] i wasnt freaking out  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] you used all caps,,,  _

 

_ [my love] okay maybe i was freaking out a little bit but  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] please dont come  _

 

_ [my love] whyyyyy _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i dont need u to see me like this _

 

_ [my love] bby  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] please bill just stay home  _

 

_ [my love] no stan let me come over  _

 

_ [my love] i just want to see u  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] stay home its covered  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] ill see u tmr  _

 

_ [my love] please.   _

 

_ [beautiful boy] no bill.  _

  
  
  


_ [billy - edDIE]  _

  
  


_ [billy] how is he  _

 

_ [edDIE] thats a question for him not me  _

 

_ [billy] i asked him and he told me to stay home  _

 

_ [edDIE] u asked him how he was and he said stay home?????? _

 

_ [billy] well there was talking in between obv _

 

_ [billy] can u please just send me a picture  _

 

_ [edDIE] fine  _

 

_ [edDIE]  _ **_[supersneakyphotoofstansinjuries.jpg]_ **

 

_ [billy] holy shit is he okay omg his nose is crooked omg omg is he in pain holy shit omg is he good omg does he need to go to the hospital hollllyyy shit omg okay is he okay  _

 

_ [edDIE] its a minor break so he doesnt have to go to the hospital cause i can probably correct it here  _

 

_ [billy] correct it?!?!?! _

 

_ [edDIE] snap it back into place  _

 

_ [billy] omg okay will it hurt o lord  _

 

_ [edDIE] for a sec  _

 

_ [billy] omg omg im okay im freaking out  _

 

_ [edDIE] chill  _

 

_ [edDIE] hes gonna be fine  _

 

_ [billy] im coming over  _

 

_ [edDIE] no u aint  _

 

_ [edDIE] i will make richie come over there and keep u there  _

 

_ [billy] hes in pain eddie  _

 

_ [edDIE] it aint ur house bill and its not mine either hes the only one who can invite u here  _

 

_ [billy] why in the gay hell did he even do it  _

 

_ [billy] he remembers what happened last time someone went after henry  _

 

_ [billy] me and rich went to jail  _

 

_ [edDIE] dont remind me  _

  
  


_ [eds<3 - chee<3]  _

  
  


_ [eds<3] can u go over to bills  _

 

_ [chee<3] yeah why  _

 

_ [eds<3] hes freaking out  _

 

_ [chee<3] lord  _

 

_ [eds<3] stan broke his nose and bill wont let me focus on snapping it back  _

 

_ [chee<3] remember that one time when i fought that kid on the playground because he pushed u off the swing  _

 

_ [chee<3] and he broke my nose and u snapped it back for me  _

 

_ [eds<3] i do  _

 

_ [eds<3] and i remember my mother running over and carrying me away after  _

 

_ [chee<3] okay maybe dont think about that part _

 

_ [eds<3] ive cleaned u up after so many fights  _

 

_ [eds<3] many of them were initiated by your jokes  _

 

_ [eds<3] and when we were younger u would always ask me to kiss it better  _

 

_ [chee<3] which is the exact moment u would kick me out of your house  _

 

_ [eds<3] i love u  _

 

_ [chee<3] i love u 2  _


	26. The Time When Something Was Wrong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy thanksgiving! 
> 
> mike is such a real one and the stan angst is gonna get worse so get ready 
> 
> theories on whats up with stan????

_ [bitchie bill - dumbass]  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] uuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnngggggg  _

 

_ [dumbass] u ok there bud  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] no  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] im concerned  _

 

_ [dumbass] arent u always as default mom friend  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] im not the mom friend _

 

_ [bitchie bill] bev is _

 

_ [dumbass] false but go off ig  _

 

_ [dumbass] why are u concerned on this particular day  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] stan wont tell me why he beat up henry  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] his ankle literally just healed and hes fighting  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i just want him to be honest with me ya know  _

 

_ [dumbass] yeah i get that  _

 

_ [dumbass] u know what i think it’s time for  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] what  _

 

_ [dumbass] some sleuthing  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] ????? _

 

_ [dumbass] an investigation into why stan would do such a thing  _

 

_ [dumbass] retrace his steps and interview witnesses  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] and by interview witnesses u mean henry  _

 

_ [dumbass] obviously  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] thatll go great _

 

_ [bitchie bill] a bi and a pan talking to derrys second biggest homophobe  _

 

_ [dumbass] second?????  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] sonia  _

 

_ [dumbass] tea  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] maybe instead of interviewing witnesses we could just retrace his steps  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] something had to set him off  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] when i left him he was in a good mood cause he had just been on the best date ever  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] so something between my car and his door must have made him snap because eddie said he never came into the house  _

 

_ [dumbass] and it must have something to do with henry so it cant be either of his parents or like an emotional thing  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] we just need to figure out what it is  _

 

_ [dumbass] we’re gonna need help we cant do this on our own  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] we need mike  _

 

_ [dumbass] yes  _

  
  


_ [billy boi - ranch boy]  _

 

_ [billy boi] u up for a good time  _

 

_ [ranch boy] ???  _

 

_ [billy boi] me and rich are gonna try and figure out why stan went after henry  _

 

_ [ranch boy]  talk??? to?? him???  _

 

_ [billy boi] he keeps ignoring me and changing to subject  _

 

_ [ranch boy] well then he doesnt want you to know  _

 

_ [ranch boy] its quite simple  _

 

_ [billy boi] yeah but i wanna know  _

 

_ [billy boi] if it got him so mad i feel like i should know _

 

_ [ranch boy] maybe he doesnt want u to  _

 

_ [ranch boy] ever think of that  _

 

_ [billy boi] yeah but im his boyfriend ‘ _

 

_ [billy boi] i just want him to be honest with me  _

 

_ [billy boi] its kind of breaking me up inside because  _

 

_ [billy boi] were spending less time with each other  _

 

_ [billy boi] and eddie is telling me that hes up at night  _

 

_ [billy boi] and i just want him to be okay  _

 

_ [billy boi] because i love him  _

 

_ [billy boi] so much mike  _

 

_ [ranch boy] i know bill  _

 

_ [ranch boy] how about  _

 

_ [ranch boy] instead of playing detective with rich u come over to the farm  _

 

_ [ranch boy] and u and i can talk for a bit and make a game plan for you to talk to stan  _

 

_ [billy boi] thank you mike  _

 

_ [ranch boy] no problem  _

 

_ [ranch boy] and my grandmother made some cookies  _

 

_ [billy boi] oh what kind  _

 

_ [ranch boy] chocolate chip peanut butter  _

 

_ [billy boi] oooooooo  _


	27. The Time When They Invented Reddie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this is jus one big interaction but i felt like posting but i still wanted the thing with stan to be top secret 
> 
> speaking of stan what do yall think is wrong with him im actually really interested in knowing your theories

_ [the loserz club]  _

  
  


_ [eds] now that thanksgiving is over can we christmas now  _

 

_ [newt] no  _

 

_ [jesus] stan its literally black friday the christmas shopping day  _

 

_ [newt] no  _

 

_ [newt] just a lil bit longer please  _

 

_ [newt] i need time to adjust  _

 

_ [softy] but christmas  _

 

_ [softy] the movies the music the atmosphere  _

 

_ [farm boy] i already have christmas wallpaper on my phone  _

 

_ [newt] why  _

 

_ [farm boy] cause  _

 

_ [newt] im never in the mood for christmas cause im jewish but its still not time _

 

_ [softy] how about tmr  _

 

_ [newt] nope  _

 

_ [newt] next saturday yall can do that  _

 

_ [softy] you know those movies that arent like christmas movies but you only watch them around christmas time  _

 

_ [newt] yes ben we’ve all seen die hard  _

 

_ [jesus] what about lord of the rings  _

 

_ [trashcan] harry potter (but only the first two weirdly)  _

 

_ [eds] the first two are the most innocent and light hearted thats why  _

 

_ [farm boy] the hobbit  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] every single british movie  _

 

_ [trashcan] i only watch sherlock around christmas  _

 

_ [newt] those are the best kinds of films honestly _

 

_ [trashcan] iron man 3: non christmas christmas movie?  _

 

_ [softy] it does take place around christmas  _

 

_ [jesus] harveys town is deocrated for christmas  _

 

_ [eds] tony gets pepper that like giant bear thing  _

 

_ [trashcan] eds do u want a giant bear for christmas  _

 

_ [eds] am i pepper?????  _

 

_ [farm boy] wait  _

 

_ [farm boy] ARE U TWO BACK TOGETHER  _

 

_ [softy] OMG RICHIE U DID IT  _

 

_ [jesus] SKDBJHKALJKDSHKFLAS;DK  _

 

_ [jesus] I DIDNT THINK HE WOULD OMG  _

 

_ [newt] UM WAIT  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] oh yeah you guys didnt know  _

 

_ [jesus] HOW COME BILL GOT TO KNOW  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] because i was involved in both the planning and aftermath  _

 

_ [softy] how were u involved in planning i came up with mariah carey  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] i took stan on a date  _

 

_ [newt] best date ever fyi  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] thank u babe ily  _

 

_ [newt] ily2  _

 

_ [farm boy] wait mariah carey, queen of my life, was involved  _

 

_ [trashcan] i serenaded eds with an acoustic version of all i want for christmas is u  _

 

_ [farm boy] awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww _

 

_ [newt] can i just point out that ben is the ultimate richie and eddie shipper  _

 

_ [jesus] tozbrak??  _

 

_ [softy] edchie????  _

 

_ [farm boy] REDDIE  _

 

_ [jesus] REDDIE  _

 

_ [newt] REDDIE  _

 

**_softy has changed their name to: #1 reddie shipper_ **

  
  


_ [#1 reddie shipper] REDDIE  _

 

_ [trashcan] REDDIE  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] REDDIE  _

 

_ [eds] REDDIE  _

  
  



	28. The Time When They Got In A Fight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you asked for it and i delivered :)

_ [my love - beautiful boy]  _

  
  


_ [my love] hey stan can we talk for a minute  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] sure but u cant come over  _

 

_ [my love] why?  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] because uh  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] my rooms a mess  _

 

_ [my love] okay……  _

 

_ [my love] i was just wondering  _

 

_ [my love] what happened to us?  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] what do you mean  _

 

_ [my love] ever since you beat up henry somethings been different  _

 

_ [my love] we rarely hang out and we’ve been like growing apart  _

 

_ [my love] eddies been telling me that you dont sleep and im just worried about u  _

 

_ [my love] and us  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] nothings happened to us bill  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] ive just been really busy with schoolwork lately  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] that doesnt mean i love you any less  _

 

_ [my love] why did u do it stan  _

 

_ [my love] why did u fight him  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i dont want to talk about this  _

 

_ [my love] please  _

 

_ [my love] if u love me at all youll tell me why  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] thats not fair bill  _

 

_ [my love] you know what else isnt fair  _

 

_ [my love] keeping secrets  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] its between me and him  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] thats all you need to know  _

 

_ [my love] please stan  _

 

_ [my love] i just want to help  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] he  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] he left me a note  _

 

_ [my love] what did it say  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] he said that uh  _

 

_ [my love] its okay you can tell me  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] he said that if we hung out again hed _

 

_ [beautiful boy] hed kill you  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] he also left some creepy photos of our date that night  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i went to confront him about it and the next thing i remember was him calling you a slur id rather not repeat and then i snapped  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i blacked out and woke up a few hours later outside of his house and i had a black eye and a broken nose  _

 

_ [my love] but but you said you got him back  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i dont know if i did  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i just  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i just wanted to keep you safe  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] because you mean the world to me  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] no  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] you are my world  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i would never forgive myself if anything happened to you  _

  
  


_ [my love] stan  _

 

_ [my love] nothings gonna happen to me  _

 

_ [my love] henrys making empty threats to scare you  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i dont feel like theyre empty bill  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] and those pictures  _

 

_ [my love] its okay hes not going to hurt me  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] im just trying to protect you  _

 

_ [my love] protect me?  _

 

_ [my love] by staying up every single night and pushing me away?  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] bill stop  _

 

_ [my love] stan you dont have to protect me im perfectly capable of that  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] yeah cause the last time that happened he got you pretty bad right?  _

 

_ [my love] i made it out better than you  _

 

_ [my love] i didnt have a broken nose and black eye right?  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] you know what were done with this topic  _

 

_ [my love] fine!  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] fine!  _

 

_ [my love] dont talk to me  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] good, i don't want to  _


	29. The Time When They Broke Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof yall

_ [bitchie bill - dumbass]  _

  
  


_ [bitchie bill] SADDKJASLKJFLKJQHWRPIJPWA;DSLKMRGUOAIWDFNBWKERHJKLJAHFLKJFHKAJFLKZDSHFKJHTIPRETUIREYTIUAGHKJDFHGKJLZJHMGHKSDHKHJGLKFJDH HSDJK HLJHG _

 

_ [dumbass] you okay  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] no  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i just got in like a huge fight with stan  _

 

_ [dumbass] did u guys break up  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] not exactly _

 

_ [bitchie bill]  _ **_[donttalktomegoodidontwantto.jpg]_ **

 

_ [dumbass] ohhhh shit  _

 

_ [dumbass] what do you need  _

 

_ [dumbass] a wingman? a planmaker? a hug? two large containers of ice cream?  _

 

_ [dumbass] ive got you  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i wish i could take back everything ive said  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i was really mean and he was just looking out for me  _

 

_ [dumbass] whyd u get into it  _

 

_ [dumbass] i only saw the last bit  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] he told me why he went after henry _

 

_ [dumbass] and?  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] henry threatened to kill me if we hung out again  _

 

_ [dumbass] shit  _

 

_ [dumbass] and then you comforted him like a good boyfriend?  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] exact opposite  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i said he didnt need to look after me and then made fun of his broken nose  _

 

_ [dumbass] bill why are u like this  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i dont know dude something in me just snapped  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i just want to make it up to him but we did the whole “dont talk to me” thing  _

 

_ [dumbass] im sorry man  _

 

_ [dumbass] maybe let the two of u settle down and then try to apologize tmr  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] okay thanks rich _

 

_ [dumbass] any time my man  _

  
  


_ [edDIE - billy]  _

 

_ [edDIE] WHAT DID YOU DO  _

 

_ [edDIE] WHY IS STAN SOBBING UNCONTROLLABLY _

 

_ [billy] we got in a huge fight  _

 

_ [edDIE] christ  _

 

_ [billy]  _ **_[theentirefight.jpg]_ **

 

_ [edDIE] why did u just attack him out of nowhere  _

 

_ [billy] i dont know  _

 

_ [billy] i cant describe it  _

 

_ [billy] i just couldn’t take it  _

 

_ [billy] he was going to such lengths and putting our relationship in jeopardy just to keep me safe  _

 

_ [billy] he told me that i was his world but he was willing to break us up so i would be out of harms way  _

 

_ [billy] i just  _

 

_ [billy] he’s so good  _

 

_ [billy] i just felt undeserving of it  _

 

_ [billy] like im the asshole that makes him cry and makes him do these things but he loves me anyways  _

 

_ [billy] i guess i just wanted him to realize that im an asshole and he doesnt need to do that for me  _

 

_ [billy] he should find someone better and move on from me  _

 

_ [edDIE] holy shit bill _

 

_ [edDIE] u should tell him that  _

 

_ [edDIE] instead of doing whatever you did  _

 

_ [billy] its too late now ive already made him cry  _

 

_ [billy] GOD WHY CANT I DO ANYTHING RIGHT  _

 

_ [billy] I SCREWED UP THE BEST THING ABOUT MY LIFE JESUS  _

  
  
  
  


_ [eds<3 - chee<3]  _

  
  


_ [eds<3] okay so richie I might have totally ruined stan and bill  _

 

_ [eds<3] still??? urbrough??  _

 

_ [chee<3] its stenbrough obv  _

 

_ [chee<3] what’d u do  _

 

_ [eds<3] bill said this  _

 

_ [eds<3]  _ **_[billsreallysadrant.jpg]_ **

 

_ [eds<3] and stan accidentally read it over my shoulder  _

 

_ [eds<3] and he’s crying even more now  _

 

_ [eds<3] and i also think bills crying  _

 

_ [chee<3] eds i leave bill for 5 minutes and u make him cry  _

 

_ [eds<3] he made himself cry  _

 

_ [eds<3] i highly doubt that your advice was any better  _

 

_ [chee<3] I told bill to wait a day until stan calmed down and then apologize  _

 

_ [eds<3] holy shit thats actually really good  _

 

_ [chee<3] see  _

 

_ [eds<3] what should I do  _

 

_ [rich<3] let them sort it out themselves I suppose  _

  
  


_ [bird - farm] _

 

_ [bird] mike I need u  _

 

_ [farm] u called  _

 

_ [bird] it’s a long story strap in  _

 

_ [bird] so bill was nagging me about why i fought henry so i told him that henry threatened to kill bill if we ever were together again so for bills safety I stopped inviting him over and stuff and I kinda pushed him away and he like went off on me about how he could take care of himself and that he didn’t need my help and what could I do because henry broke my nose and then I yelled at him and he told me not to speak to him and I said good I don’t want to  _

 

_ [farm] holy shit  _

 

_ [bird] that’s not all  _

 

_ [bird] so then eddies texting bill and I’m reading over his shoulder as I cry and bill tells eddie that he feels undeserving of my love and care and that he’s a huge asshole that makes me cry and that I should move on and find someone else and how he ruined the one good thing in his life  _

 

_ [farm] woooow okay um  _

 

_ [bird] i just want him to see how much he means to me and that I don’t want anyone else I want him  _

 

_ [farm] well why the fuck are you talking to me say something to him  _

 

_ [bird] well like the whole dont talk to me thing _

 

_ [bird] and it just feels too soon  _

 

_ [bird] and what if he doesnt even care  _

 

_ [bird] did we break up are we over  _

 

_ [bird] what if hes already gone  _

 

_ [farm] okay um i really dont feel like im the right person for this  _

 

_ [bird] please mike i trust u the most with this  _

 

_ [bird] your my best friend _

 

_ [farm] okay  _

 

_ [farm] i dont think you guys have broken up  _

 

_ [farm] but stan i really dont know im not too great at this  _

 

_ [farm] i seriously believe that your best option is to talk to him honestly  _

 

_ [farm] you already know how he feels about this  _

 

_ [farm] so why dont you tell him how you feel  _

 

_ [bird] but i dont know how i feel  _

 

_ [farm] tell him what you told me  _

 

_ [farm] about how you dont want anyone else _

 

_ [bird] some part of me feels like he wants someone else  _

 

_ [farm] he doesnt  _

 

_ [farm] trust me  _

  
  
  
  
  


_ [bill - ben - bev] _

  
  


_ [bill] bev and ben i need your guys help  _

 

_ [bill] me and stan got in this huge fight and now were not on speaking terms  _

 

_ [bill]  _ **_[theentirefight.jpg]_ **

 

_ [bev] oh are you guys  _

 

_ [bev] broken up  _

 

_ [bill] i dont know _

 

_ [ben] ok um  _

 

_ [ben] why do u need our help  _

 

_ [bill] i just want to apologize to him for the whole thing  _

 

_ [bill] u guys are like the most functioning couple i know  _

 

_ [ben] we are?  _

 

_ [bill] well like richie and eddie ive already spoken to and it didnt help much  _

 

_ [bill] richie told me to wait a day and eddie just yelled at me about why stan was crying and i just broke down to him  _

 

_ [bev] oh ok so we’ve already had a break down this is worse than i thought  _

_ [ben] do u wanna come over and we can talk about this in person over some ice cream  _

 

_ [bill] yes please  _

  
  
  


_ [bev - mike - ben]  _

  
  


_ [bev] mike i assume that u have already been told about the fight by stan  _

 

_ [mike] yeah howd u know  _

 

_ [bev] your stans best friend and he always goes to u  _

 

_ [ben] bill is on his way to my house now so we have to talk fast  _

 

_ [mike] about what  _

 

_ [bev] about how were gonna fix this  _

 

_ [mike] should we add richie and eddie  _

 

**_bev has added eddie to the chat_ **

**_bev has added richie to the chat_ **

  
  


_ [bev] i assume u two know about the fight too _

 

_ [eddie] know about it? im in the same room as stan of course i know  _

 

_ [richie] i was the coolest bro ever for bill  _

 

_ [bev] never say that again  _

 

_ [ben] bill is on his way to my place so we dont have a lot of time  _

 

_ [mike] we need ideas  _

 

_ [richie] for…. _

 

_ [mike] fixing this mess   _

 


	30. The Time When They Figured Out What To Do

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow sorry i didnt post yesterday but uh here ya go

 

_ [ben - bev - mike - richie - eddie] _

  
  


_ [ben] ok bill just left let’s get planning  _

 

_ [bev] could we just lock them in a room for like 4 hours while we get lunch and then come back and see what happened  _

 

_ [mike] stan would not speak to anyone for a week  _

 

_ [eddie] too high of a chance that they’ll end up killing each other  _

 

_ [richie] how about we secretly record each of them saying what they’d say to each other and then play them the others recording  _

 

_ [mike] for once richie doesnt have the worst idea  _

 

_ [richie] haha suck it bev _

 

_ [bev] i hope u choke  _

 

_ [richie] i mean if your into that ;)  _

 

_ [eddie] RICHIE FOCUS  _

 

_ [mike] okay so far we have two ideas anything else  _

 

_ [ben] intervention???  _

 

_ [richie] easy chance of one of them walking out  _

 

_ [bev] is this all weve got  _

 

_ [eddie] could we bake them a cake that says talk to each other or else  _

 

_ [mike] super threatening love that  _

 

_ [ben] i like bevs idea  _

 

_ [eddie] same but richies requires less work  _

 

_ [eddie] i mean we have to get both of them into someones room and then lock the door and leave and trust that they wont strangle each other  _

 

_ [richie] who knows eds maybe theyre into that  _

 

_ [eddie] dont call me that  _

 

_ [mike] i can get stan there  _

 

_ [ben] i could probably hold bill down to keep him from bolting  _

 

_ [bev] they wont kill each other because theyre both in love  _

 

_ [richie] lunch is easy enough  _

 

_ [richie] we could go to that mexican place  _

 

_ [eddie] okay is this the plan  _

 

_ [mike] guess so  _

 

_ [bev] tuesday we get bill to my place cause no ones home to hear them scream and then mike u get stan and being him here  _

 

_ [bev] and then we just get out of my room super quick and lock them in there and go to lunch  _

 

_ [bev] richie your in charge of getting us a place to go to lunch  _

 

_ [bev] make sure the service takes forever so we’re out longer  _

 

_ [richie] theres this diner in the next town over that takes FOREVER  _

 

_ [bev] great well go there  _

 

_ [ben] what should the cover be  _

 

_ [bev] huh  _

 

_ [ben] why are we all assembling at your house  _

 

_ [bev] oh uh  _

 

_ [eddie] marvel marathon  _

 

_ [richie] smort  _

  
  
  
  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

  
  


_ [jesus] yooo _

 

_ [jesus] marvel movie marathon my house tuesday  _

 

_ [farm boy] down  _

 

_ [softy] ditto  _

 

_ [newt] yeah  _

 

_ [trashcan] swaggy  _

 

_ [eds] ill be there  _

 

_ [eds] and beep beep rich  _

 

_ [trashcan] bill? _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] oh uh sure  _

  
  
  
  
  


_ [dumbass - bitchie bill] _

  
  


_ [dumbass] hey bud  _

 

_ [dumbass] u ok  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] of course why wouldnt i be _

 

_ [dumbass] u just seemed at a lil crestfallen  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] no no im fine  _

 

_ [dumbass] u sure _

 

_ [bitchie bill] yup no sadness here none at all  _

 

_ [dumbass] that wasnt very reassuring  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] leave it alone rich im fine  _


	31. The Time When They Were Locked in A Room

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY I NEED HELP REAL QUICK 
> 
> okay for the next chapter would u rather have me continue with this text format or break it for one chapter to get the over all hilarity of the situation 
> 
> just letting me know would help so so much thanks

_ [farm - bird]  _

  
  


_ [farm] hey im on my way over to bevs do u want me to walk with u  _

 

_ [bird] sure  _

 

_ [bird] ill be out in a sec  _

  
  
  
  


_ [mike - bev - eddie - richie - ben]  _

  
  


_ [mike] ive got eyes on bird  _

 

_ [bev] ???  _

 

_ [mike] i just thought itd be funny if we had code names  _

 

_ [bev] oh  _

 

_ [bev] straight up bitch is already here at my house  _

 

_ [eddie] sis bill is anything from straight  _

 

_ [bev] fine  _

 

_ [bev] pan bitch is here and ready to cry  _

 

_ [bev] thats the other thing  _

 

_ [bev] bill is sad  _

 

_ [richie] WHY  _

 

_ [bev] stan coming  _

 

_ [bev] hes worried  _

 

_ [ben] about  _

 

_ [bev] it being awkward  _

 

_ [richie] theyRE LITERALLY DATING  _

 

_ [richie] yOwZa  _

 

_ [eddie] oh god his catchphrase is back  _

 

_ [richie] yOWZA eDs tHoUGHt yA lOvED mE  _

 

_ [mike] CHRIST RICHIE WE DONT NEED THIS RIGHT NOW  _

 

_ [mike] THIS IS A TIME SENSITIVE MISSION YOWZA ALL U WANT LATER ALRIGHT  _

 

_ [richie] yoWZa mike okay  _

 

_ [mike] dont.  _

 

_ [richie] okay  _

 

_ [bev] bird has landed repeat  _

 

_ [bev] bird has landed  _

 

_ [mike] yay! my code name  _

 

_ [bev] :)  _

  
  
  


_ [bird - farm]  _

  
  
  


_ [bird] MIKE PLEASE COME BACK  _

 

_ [bird] PLEASE LET ME OUT  _

 

_ [bird] IM SCARED  _

 

_ [farm] why are u scared he’s not gonna mug u or anything  _

 

_ [bird] what if we breakup _

 

_ [farm] don’t be silly  _

 

_ [farm] just talk  _

 

_ [farm] ill be back in 3 or 4 hours  _

 

_ [bird] HOURS HOLY SHIT  _

 

_ [bird] MIKE PLEASE  _

 

_ [bird] MIIIKKKKEEEE _

  
  
  


_ [bitchie bill - dumbass]  _

  
  


_ [bitchie bill] i know youre not gonna respond but just know  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] i hate u  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] stans in bevs closet and refuses to come out so this is what youve done  _

 

_ [dumbass] u could say  _

 

_ [dumbass] he needs to come out of the closet  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] fuck u  _

 

_ [dumbass] yoWzA  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] nope  _


	32. The Time When It Was Live Action

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here it is. the live action chapter i've been dreaming of doing. sorry it took so long i just wanted to do it right. i hope you all enjoy it 
> 
> also this may not be the last live action chapter wink wink

“And that is just some of the reasons why Loki is not a villain, just an incredible misunderstood and abused child.” Stan finished. 

 

“Holy shit. I had no idea you were going to launch into this huge essay about it.” Mike said as he and Stan approached Bev’s house. He silently and stealthily pulled out his phone to text the others. 

 

“I’m super passionate about Loki, what can I say. Tom Hiddleston got me feeling some kind of way.” Stan’s expression changed as he and Mike approached the door. “Hey before we go in, do you think it’ll be awkward between me and Bill?” 

 

“Well, judging on your last conversation together..” 

 

Stan groaned as he put his head in his hands. “Maybe I should have stayed home.” 

 

“No!” Mike jumped. In order for the plan to work he needed Stan there. “I’m sure it’ll be fine. Don’t trust the ace guy on dating advice, you know.” Mike joked. 

 

“Hopefully you’re right.” Stan knocked. 

 

“Doors unlocked, come on up!” Bev called from somewhere in the house. 

 

Stan made his way through Bev’s house as Mike trailed behind. When he made it to Bev’s room he saw Bill already sitting on Bev’s bed. Bill tried his best not to make eye contact with Stan. 

 

_ He looks even cuter in person. I decided to yell at that beauty of a human being. God, why am I just the worst?  _ Bill thought to himself. 

 

Out of the corner of his eye, Stan noticed Ben shift uneasily. He saw Richie look a few times at Eddie and Bev, and then nod at Mike.

 

Suddenly Stan felt Mike’s hand around his waist and then he was lifted off the ground. Richie, Eddie and Bev rush out of the room followed by Ben. Bill made a dash for the door but to no avail. Mike edged himself out of the room, still holding Stan off the ground, before dropping him right before running out of the room. The door slammed behind him. 

 

“Guys!” Bill yelled. “What the fuck!” 

 

“We’ll be back.” Richie called. “Sort out your stupid arguments while were gone!” Stan heard them walk down the hallway and the front door close. 

 

“Maybe we should try to-” Bill started.

 

“Nope! Nope! Nope!” Stan screamed as he ran to the only place he could get away from Bill. Bev’s closet. 

 

He slammed the door behind him as he was now crammed into this tiny place full of clothes. Bev’s closet was not organized, not even in the slightest. He sat down on a pile of shirts and bras that probably weren’t washed and texted Mike. 

 

“Stan! You can come out.” Bill pleaded through the closed closet door. 

 

“Nope. I’m not going anywhere until everyone comes back in 4 hours!” 

 

“We’re trapped in here for four hours!?!?!” 

 

“Yup. And if you want to talk, talk to me through the door.” Bill couldn’t see Stan, but he’d bet a million dollars that Stan just crossed his arms in a huff. 

 

“Wow. Award for world’s most dysfunctional couple goes to us, I guess.” Bill joked. 

 

“Are we even a couple? With the way we ended our last conversation, I thought this talk was gonna be a breakup.” 

 

“Of course we’re still a couple. If you want to be one.” 

 

“I do, really. But it’s just.. The last time we talked…” Stan trailed off. 

 

“You know what? Let’s just forget the entirety of that.” 

 

“It was kind of hard to forget, Bill.” 

 

“Okay. I owe you an explanation. The reason I snapped at you like I did was because I…I… w-w-well..” Bill cursed his stutter, that only seemed to come out when he needed to speak clearly. 

 

“I r-r-reali-z-zed that y-y-you would p-put our relationship in d-d-danger just s-so I w-w-would be okay…” 

 

Bill saw the closet door open slightly and Stan peaked out. 

 

“I d-d-didn’t feel d-d-d-deserving of t-t-that love because I-I’m a huge a-asshole-” 

 

“No you’re not, Bill.” 

 

“Yeah, I k-k-kind of am. I m-m-mean, I m-made you c-c-cry and i-if you l-l-l-love someo-o-one you sh-sh-shouldn’t do t-t-that to them.” 

 

The closet door opened and Stan popped out and wrapped his arms around Bill.

 

“You’re not an asshole. I love you so much.” Stan sounded on the verge of tears. 

 

“W-W-Why, Stan?” Bill was crying too, now. “I-I’m not that s-s-special. Y-You could g-go find anyone like, n-n-no, better t-than me.” 

 

“That’s not true. I don’t want anyone else. And frankly, I don’t give a shit if they’re better than you. Because none of them  _ are _ you and I only want you.” Stan cupped Bill’s face and wiped away a tear. “You’re the person I’m meant to be with, Bill Denbrough. And I love you.” 

  
  


“S-S-Stanley Uris, you’re the person I’m meant t-t-to be with. I love you, more than you could ever know.” 

 

Bill leaned in and kissed Stan, something he had been dreaming of doing since the moment they fought. As he pulled away, he noticed something on Stan’s leg. 

 

“Dude.” Bill laughed. “You’ve got one of Bev’s bras on your leg.” 

 

Stan let out a little shriek and shook the bra off his leg, which made Bill roar with laughter. 

 

“So what the hell are we gonna do for 4 hours while they’re out?” Bill asked, still laughing. 

 

“Could we still movie marathon?” 

 

Bill and Stan walked up to Bev’s door. The door knob was locked from the outside. There were locks on the windows too. 

 

“This just makes me think about how fucking rough Bev’s home life must be.” Stan said as he examined the locks on the windows. 

 

“Could we call them?” 

 

“Good idea. I’ll try Mike, you try Richie.” 

 

Stan pulled out his phone and called Mike. The line rung a few times before he picked up. 

 

“How’s it going, Stan? Have you killed him yet?” Mike joked. 

 

“Very funny. We sorted everything out, can you guys come back and get us out of here?” 

 

“How do I know you’re not lying to me?” 

 

“Hold on.” Stan put Mike on speaker phone and silently urged Bill to talk to Mike.

 

“Hey Mike, we got it under control. Could you guys come back and let us the fuck out of here.” 

 

“I’m gonna let you guys talk to Bev.” Bill and Stan heard the phone being passed and then Mike explaining everything to Bev. 

 

“Hello boys. I trust that you two got everything sorted out?” 

 

“Yes, Bev. Can you come back now? We’re bored out of our minds.” 

 

“Of course. We’ll be there shortly.” 

 

“Then can we have a marvel marathon?” Bill asked. 

 

“Yup.” 

  
  



	33. wow it’s been a while

hey, 

let’s pretend that the last chapter where i like ended the entire thing never happened. I had a bit of a mental breakdown when i posted that cuz I was going through a shit ton of stress and stuff and at the time it seemed like the best decision but now the stress is gone and it’s a new year so yeah. 

i tried writing a stranger things version of this fic but it just wasn’t the same and I realized how much I missed writing this so I was like fuck it let’s keep going. There was still so much I wanted to do so let’s keep going! 

in the next day or two chapters will be back so keep your eye out


	34. The Time When They Went To Another Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow it was so fun to write another one of these chapter uh i missed this

_ [the loserz club] _

  
  


_ [trashcan] woah you guys  _

 

_ [trashcan] did we kidnap stan and bill  _

 

_ [softy] mayhaps  _

 

_ [stanney the manny] i will be pressing charges in a court of law  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] expect a court order to appear in your mailbox in the next 3-5 business _

_ days  _

 

_ [eds] now that stan has refound love hes back to being a robot  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] would u sue me my love  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] for wakanda without question  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] but no cause you were involved in the kidnapping so your not getting a court order  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] yay!  _

 

_ [softy] we stan a couple who doesnt sue each other  _

  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [jesus] hey party people  _

 

_ [jesus] theres a party going down a block away  _

 

_ [jesus] assemble at my house  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] avengers a-  _

 

_ [trashcan] *avenger theme song plays loudly*  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] im so hyped to party _

 

_ [farm boy] someone needs to make sure that stan doesnt get too drunk and goes near a pool  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] i call dibs  _

 

_ [softy] if i recall correctly u were drunk too  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] mayhaps  _

 

_ [eds] this party is gonna be a trainwreck  _

  
  
  


_  [the loserz club]  _

  
  


_ [stanney the manney] GUYZI LKOST MIE  _

 

_ [softy] ???  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] BAB WEHR ARE U  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] BEROOM  _

 

_ [trashcan] have yhall seen mike  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] i los hm at zhe acholololol tabel  _

 

_ [softy] wait  _

 

_ [softy] mikes GONE!?!?!?! _

 

_ [jesus] YOU LOST MIKE  _

 

_ [jesus] HE WAS SUPPOSED TO LOOK AFTER YOU  _

 

_ [eds] STAN  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] itwasntnmehhyfuaklthestareddrnkinganbtdleft  _

 

_ [trashcan] how am i sober but stan isnt  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] ACJOLOOOL  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] FUCK YEAH ACHILOILO  _

 

_ [jesus] everyone search the house  _

 

_ [jesus] objective: find mike  _

 

_ [farm boy] IMON THE ROIF  _

 

_ [softy] OH GOD IS HE ON THE ROOF  _

 

_ [jesus] HOW DID HE DO THAT  _

 

_ [farm boy] parjour  _

 

_ [eds] was that french or drunk gibberish  _

 

_ [trashcan] knowing mike probably both  _

 

_ [trashcan] im making my way onto the roof  _

 

_ [eds] please be careful  _

 

_ [trashcan] dont worry babe im sober  _

 

_ [eds] how are u sober but stans already drunk  _

 

_ [trashcan] i have no idea  _

 

_ [trashcan] also i got mike down and he passed out  _

 

_ [jesus] damnit do we have to go i haven’t even gotten drunk yet  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] IMDRNK YET  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] I DUNK 3  _

 

_ [eds] yeah bev sorry i think we shoud get going  _

 

_ [eds] richie cant carry mike  _

 

_ [trashcan] HES SO FUCKIN STRONG I CANT HOLD HIM  _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	35. The Time When They Were Flirty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stan is super flirty in this for so reason

_ [my love - beautiful boy] _

 

_ [my love] take me to an art museum and make out with me  _

 

_ [my love] for the aesthetic  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] but they said not to touch the masterpieces _

 

_ [my love] did u just  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] but you know what _

 

_ [beautiful boy] someones got to nail those paintings to the wall  _

 

_ [my love] holy shit stan  _

 

_ [my love] please come over asap  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] see u in three babe  _

  
  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] you all should give my boyfriend credit  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] hes smooth when he wants to be  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] damn straight babe  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] fUCK  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] that was the hottest text message ive ever received _

 

_ [trashcan] ew can u two get a room _

 

_ [softy] says the guy who once said this  _

 

_ [softy]  _ **_[icanthinkofanotherplacetoputmymouthgerms.jpg]_ **

 

_ [eds] ew i remember that _

 

_ [trashcan] uh thats one of my best  _

 

_ [jesus] no it wasnt richie  _

 

_ [jesus] it was one of the worst things ive ever read  _

 

_ [farm boy] uh can u guys keep it down  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] awww hes hungover  _

 

_ [farm boy] the sun is so fuckin bright why _

 

_ [stanney the manney] mike im coming over prepare to be un hungover  _

  
  


_ [chee<3 - eds<3]  _

 

_ [chee<3] hey eds i like your pants  _

 

_ [eds<3] thanks they were 50% off at old navy  _

 

_ [chee<3} id like them 100% off  _

 

_ [eds<3] thats a horrible way to run a buisness  _

 

_ [chee<3] eddie no thats not what i meant  _

 

_ [chee<3] i was being flirty  _

 

_ [eds<3] oh  _

 

_ [eds<3] well in that case  _

 

_ [eds<3] it was very good  _

  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [trashcan] GUESS WHO JUST GOT A JOB  _

 

_ [trashcan] IM A HARD WORKING AMERICAN CITIZEN NOW  _

 

_ [softy] wheres the job  _

 

_ [trashcan] derry house of pizza  _

 

_ [eds] oooo i love it there  _

 

_ [eds] now even more _

 

_ [jesus] whens your first day  _

 

_ [trashcan] tmr  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] wow only three of us have jobs  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] richie does pizza, mike works library, bev fixs piano and sell _

 

_ [stanney the manney] babe your doing that thing where u forgot how grammar works  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] oh shit sorry  _

 


	36. The Time With Tyler

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if u get it ill love u forever and ever

_[the loserz club]_

 

_[eds] im only telling yhall this cause richie cant use his phone during work_

 

_[eds] im ordering a pizza and under special instructions I’m putting delivery person must have curly brown hair_

 

_[stanney the manney] wow thanks for letting everyone know_

 

_[stanney the manney] that was such important info for my day to day life_

 

_[farm boy] the sarcasm dripping from that text was enough to turn any water into salt water_

 

_[bill nye the science guy] kinky_

 

_[softy] how was that kinky_

 

_[bill nye the science guy] dripping just sounds dirty_

 

_[stanney the manney] how am i attracted to u_

 

_[stanney the manney] you know what it doenst matter i love u_

 

_[bill nye the science guy] i love u too_

 

_[eds] order has been placed itll be arriving in 15 minutes_

 

_[stanney the manney] thanks for the update i really cared_

  


_[the loserz club]_

  


_[eds] guys guys guys hes here_

 

_[eds] hes getting out of the car_

 

_[eds] aw hes wearing the cutest shirt_

 

_[eds] okay hes ringing the door bell_

 

_[jesus] can i get in on some pizza_

 

_[eds] of course_

 

_[eds] i got the pizza_

 

_[stanney the manney] that was fast_

 

_[eds] he didnt recognize me_

 

_[softy] your??dating??_

 

_[stanney the manney] youve??been??best??friends??for??8??years??_

 

_[eds] its like boris all over again_

 

_[stanney the manney] richie has successfully cloned himself_

 

_[bill nye the science guy] he has achieved what no man could ever do_

 

_[trashcan] i see u have met tyler_

 

_[eds] TYLER?!?!?_

 

_[trashcan] never met him before but we look exactly the same_

 

_[trashcan] hes from castle rock_

 

_[jesus] wild eddie can i still have that pizza tho_

 

_[trashcan] OH SHIT U GOT PIZZA_

 

_[trashcan] eds im on my way_

 

_[eds] one, don’t call me eds_

 

_[eds] two, tyler was kinda cute_

 

_[trashcan] GASP EDDIE I THOUGHT U LOVED ME_

 

_[trashcan] HOW DARE YOU CHEAT ON ME WITH THAT UGLY SON OF A BITCH_

 

_[stanney the manney] you??have??the??same??face??_

  
  
  



	37. The Time When They Figured Out What To Watch Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess whos bacc
> 
> it sonia kaspbracc

_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] what should we watch for a movie on friday  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] summer of 84  _

 

_ [jesus] eighth grade  _

 

_ [eds] beautiful boy cause im in love with timothee  _

 

_ [trashcan] bandersnatch  _

 

_ [softy] bumblebee  _

 

_ [farm boy] whatever yhall want  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] im feeling summer of 84 in this chilis  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] HA HA SUCKERS  _

 

_ [trashcan] wait eds  _

 

_ [trashcan] me or timothee chalamet  _

 

_ [eds] you obvioulsy  _

 

_ [trashcan] damn straight  _

 

_ [jesus] richie nothing u do is straight  _

 

_ [trashcan] damn bi  _

 

_ [farm boy] so summer of 84  _

 

_ [jesus] uh fineeee  _

 

_ [eds] but timmooottthhheeeee  _

 

_ [trashcan] timothee timothee timothee  _

 

_ [eds] TIMOTHEE TIMOTHEE TIMOTHEE  _

 

_ [softy] i would watch beautiful boy  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] ive done enough crying today  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] doing what?!?  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] looking at ur instagram crying cause my boyfriends so cute  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] now im crying  _

 

_ [trashcan] uh can u two do this later we were in the middle of something  _

 

_ [farm boy] all for summer of 84 say aye  _

 

_ [farm boy] aye  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] aye  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] aye  _

 

_ [jesus] aye  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] 4 vs 3 we win  _

 

_ [eds] damnit  _

 

_ [farm boy] we’ll watch beautiful boy next week eddie  _

 

_ [eds] okay _

  
  
  


_ [edwardio - cowboy]  _

 

_ [edwardio] mike if i tell u something do you promise not to tell richie or anyone else  _

 

_ [cowboy] why is it always me  _

 

_ [edwardio] please mike  _

 

_ [cowboy] fine  _

 

_ [edwardio] i think my mom is following me  _

 

_ [edwardio] i saw her earlier at the pharmacy  _

 

_ [edwardio] she was just watching me  _

 

_ [edwardio] and then i saw her again when i ordered pizza  _

 

_ [edwardio] its freaking me out  _

 

_ [cowboy] she wouldnt try and  _

 

_ [cowboy] take u back would she  _

 

_ [edwardio] i dont know  _

 

_ [edwardio] i dont want to leave rich  _

 

_ [edwardio] i love him  _

 

_ [cowboy] i know eddie  _

 

_ [edwardio] why does she always find a way to fuck up everything i love  _

 

_ [edwardio] i surrendered my entire childhood to her what more could she want  _

 

_ [edwardio] my boyfriend? my happiness? my friends? my real family?  _

 

_ [cowboy] well be there for you if she tries anything  _

 

_ [cowboy] but i doubt richie would ever let that happen  _

 

_ [cowboy] and im gonna start charging yhall for advice  _

 

_ [edwardio] thanks mike  _

 

_ [cowboy] anytime  _

 


	38. The Time When Stan Had Multiple Personalities

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> many things:
> 
> -im not gonna be posting that much this week cause its the end of my semester so ive got a shit ton of tests 
> 
> \- the overthrowing in algebra class happened to me, today
> 
> -stans whole 'do yhall hate me' thing was something i was thinking about all day

_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [farm boy] im instating a new policy  _

 

_ [farm boy] $5 for advice and double for romantic advice  _

 

_ [farm boy] my advice is so useful to yhall ive decided to make a profit  _

 

_ [trashcan] damn mike who pushed you over the edge _

 

_ [trashcan] was it stan  _

 

_ [farm boy] no one pushed me over  _

 

_ [farm boy] im just broke  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] damn millennials are ruining the advice industry  _

 

_ [farm boy] stan take ur cynical attitude elsewhere  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] my cynical attitude is my only attitude  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] false what about soft stan  _

 

_ [farm boy] aww i love soft stan  _

 

_ [trashcan] soft stan is a cutie  _

 

_ [eds] tea  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] whos soft stan  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] occasionally you’ll be cute and soft  _

 

_ [trashcan] so we decided to call it soft stan  _

 

_ [farm boy] there’s also angry stan and richie stan  _

 

_ [softy] richie stan is when u start being immature  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] damn what is this  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] split????  _

 

_ [softy] yes  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] name one time when i was richie stan  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] why you tried to backflip off my shed and yelled  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] IM BRENDON FUCKIN URIE  _

 

_ [trashcan] when you got our entire algebra class to revolt against the teacher and overthrow the government  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] idiot that was u  _

 

_ [trashcan] o shit your right  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] im always right  _

 

_ [softy] he aint no damn leftie  _

 

_ [eds] ben i love u but  _

 

_ [eds] that made no sense  _

 

_ [softy] i know….  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] serious question  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] do u guys hate me  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] oh yeah stan i hate you so much i started dating u and i took you to semi out of pure hatred  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] i mean do u guys hate how mean i am sometimes  _

 

_ [eds] its the cornerstone of your personality  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] i know but sometimes i say stuff and u guys look sad and it makes me sad  _

 

_ [farm boy] stan  _

 

_ [farm boy] we would all die for u  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] i almost did  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] thanks guys  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] and bill i love u but dear god if you ever try that again  _

  
  


_ [edwardio - cowboy]  _

 

_ [edwardio] mike its getting worse  _

 

_ [cowboy] how  _

 

_ [edwardio] shes following me everywhere  _

 

_ [edwardio] school home store everywhere _

 

_ [edwardio] her car is like my fucking shadow  _

 

_ [cowboy] eddie this is getting kinda serious  _

 

_ [cowboy] i think we should tell richie  _

  
  
  



	39. The Time They Talked Troye Sivan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhhhhhh im high on dayquil and im stressed and depressed

_ [edwardio-cowboy]  _

 

_ [edwardio] WHAT ARE YOU CRAZY _

 

_ [cowboy] no i just think its getting to a point where he should know  _

 

_ [cowboy] that way if something does happen to u he’ll be able to take care of it  _

 

_ [edwardio] i know your right but he always goes so extreme sometimes  _

 

_ [cowboy] its because he loves u  _

 

_ [edwardio] will u tell him with me  _

 

_ [cowboy] uh fine  _

 

_ [edwardio] thanks mike ily _

 

_ [cowboy] ily  _

  
  


_ [eddie- mike-richie]  _

  
  


_ [mike] richie eddie has something to tell u  _

 

_ [richie] why r u here then  _

 

_ [mike] moral support  _

 

_ [richie] fair enough  _

 

_ [mike] eddie floors all yours  _

 

_ [eddie] okay rich don’t freak but  _

 

_ [eddie] sonias been watching me and following me  _

 

_ [richie] WHAT  _

 

_ [richie] THAT FUCKIN BITCH  _

 

_ [eddie] i said dont freak  _

 

_ [richie] DID SHE HURT YOU _

 

_ [richie] DID SHE TRY AND TAKE YOU  _

 

_ [richie] I STG I WILL BE THROWING HANDS IF SHE LAID A HAND ON U  _

 

_ [eddie] richie calm down  _

 

_ [richie] i cant eds im worried  _

 

_ [richie] i dont want her to take u away from me  _

 

_ [eddie] and i dont want to leave you  _

 

_ [eddie] im worried too  _

 

_ [mike] im just gonna stop reading these texts cause this is weird with me here  _

 

_ [richie] im gonna be with u _

 

_ [richie] always just in case she tries anything  _

 

_ [eddie] i dont need a babysitter rich  _

 

_ [richie] im not im just  _

 

_ [eddie] just what  _

 

_ [richie] trying to protect you  _

 

_ [eddie] i appreciate that rich  _

 

_ [eddie] but what if she tries something on u  _

 

_ [richie] she wouldnt be able to get by me  _

 

_ [richie] im a bad boy rememeber  _

 

_ [mike] richie u fractured ur pinkie hitting a wall  _

 

_ [richie] YOU KNOW WHAT MIKE  _

  
  
  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

  
  


_ [farm boy] which troye sivan song describes your aesthetic  _

 

_ [trashcan] strawberries and cigarettes  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] my my my  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] talk me down _

 

_ [eds] bloom  _

 

_ [jesus] wild  _

 

_ [softy] heaven  _

 

_ [farm boy] fools  _

 

_ [farm boy] also this is exactly what i expected you all to say  _

 

_ [farm boy] get unpredictable  _

 

_ [jesus] god rich you really are strawberries and cigarettes  _

 

_ [eds] its the aesthetic of our relationship _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] stan u really are talk me down  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] damn straight  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] also in the middle of a breakdown i love midterm week  _

 

_ [softy] mood  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] ive had entirely too much dayquil and i think i read minds  _

 

_ [trashcan] oh yeah then what am i thinking about right now  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] fucking eddie or your massive dick  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] or maybe both  _

 

_ [trashcan] you magician  _

 

_ [eds] rich where are you right now and are you anywhere near a bed  _

 

_ [farm boy] NOT HERE EDDIE  _

 


	40. The One Where Stan Climbed A Tree (Again)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeet stan is the bird father

_ [the loserz club]  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [stanney the manney] GUYS THERE IS AN ABANDONED BABY BIRD IN MY YARD  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [trashcan] dammit stan not again  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [bill nye the science guy] again?  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [trashcan] there’s always a bird ever since we were kids  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [stanney the manney] IM CLIMBING THE TREE TO GET IT  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [eds] STAN YOUR NOSE IS STILL BROKEN  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [stanney the manney] YOU FIXED IT ILL BE FINE  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [jesus] the last time he did this didn’t he fall out of the tree and impale his leg on a branch  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [farm boy] yes  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [farm boy] yes he did  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [softy] how do you even know it was abandoned  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [stanney the manney] I’ve been watching it for a few days now and it’s mother never showed  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [eds] it’s probably starving  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [stanney the manney] that’s why im getting it  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [stanney the manney] this tree is much higher than anticipated _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [bill nye the science guy] god stan i can see you from my room  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [bill nye the science guy] please be careful  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [farm boy] are we not gonna talk about how hard it’s gonna be for him to get down the tree while holding a baby bird  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [stanney the manney] that’s what the trampoline is for  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [bill nye the science guy] STAN NO  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [eds] might I add that he’s had a shit ton of dayquil in the past few days  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [bill nye the science guy] OH GOD  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [jesus] i don’t know who im more worried for stan or bill  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [trashcan] bill stan has experience with this thing  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [softy] so he always jumped out of a tree holding a baby bird into a trampoline  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [trashcan] not a tree that tall  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [farm boy] Christ  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [bill nye the science guy] OH MY LORD HES GONNA JUMP  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [trashcan] your boyfriend is a climbing boi  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [farm boy] beep beep  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [eds] i can’t watch  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [jesus] are we all watching him out of our windows  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [bill nye the science guy] OH MY GOD HES JUMPED IM RUNNING TO HIS HOUSE TO CHECK ON HIM  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [stanney the manney] the bird is okay  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [eds] and you  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [eds] do i have to get my medical fanney pack  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [stanney the manney] im fine  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [bill nye the science guy] that trampoline is incredibly sturdy  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [stanney the manney] what should i name him  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [eds] percy  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ [farm boy] please  _ _   
_ _   
_ __ [stanney the manney] absolutely 

 

_ [stanney the manney] bill say hello to our son percy  _

 

_ [stanney the manney]  _ **_[thecutestbabybirdever.jpg]_ **

 

_ [farm boy] i would die for percy  _

 

_ [trashcan] one might say  _

 

_ [eds] oh god i feel a bad joke coming  _

 

_ [trashcans] stans good at picking up chicks  _

 

_ [jesus] beep beep loser  _

  
  
  


_ [richie - stan - bill]  _

 

_ [richie] stanis the manis  _

 

_ [richie] bad bitch bill  _

 

_ [richie] my boys whats poppin  _

 

_ [stan] never speak like that again lest you want to get stabbed in the neck  _

 

_ [richie] sorry  _

 

_ [richie] i have a job for you two  _

 

_ [bill] the last ‘job’ you gave us stan broke his ankle  _

 

_ [stan] and fractured my knee cap  _

 

_ [richie] this one is non dangerous  _

 

_ [bill] go on…  _

 

_ [richie] i need you guys to spy on sonia  _

 

_ [bill] JESUS CHRIST RICHIE  _

  
  
  


__


	41. The Time When Timothee Chalamet Was Snubbed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> timothee chalamet was snubbed at the oscars i will take this to my grave

_ [richie - stan - bill]  _

  
  


_ [richie] please guys just to make sure she doesnt _

 

_ [bill] doesnt what  _

 

_ [richie] try to take eddie back  _

 

_ [stan] oh shit has she tried  _

 

_ [richie] no but eds says shes been stalking him all week  _

 

_ [stan] hi  _

 

_ [stan] WHAT THE FRESH FUCK  _

 

_ [stan] bill we gotta cause thats fucked up with a capital F  _

 

_ [richie] press f to pay respects  _

 

_ [bill] beep beep asshat  _

 

_ [bill] and we will  _

 

_ [bill] well follow her in my car  _

 

_ [bill] itll be like bonding time  _

 

_ [stan] yay bonding time  _

 

_ [richie] but dont forget the mission  _

 

_ [richie] thanks guys  _

  
  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [eds] if black panther is a furry what the fuck is spiderman  _

 

_ [softy] instecty??  _

 

_ [trashcan] my fursona is a wolf  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] i hope you die in a garbage fire  _

 

_ [trashcan] damn  _

 

_ [trashcan] clearly no love for my fursona here  _

 

_ [jesus] richie no  _

 

_ [trashcan] sounds like something a furry would say  _

 

_ [eds] how you would know what a furry would say  _

 

_ [eds] unless  _

 

_ [farm boy] he was the furry this whole time  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] DUN DUN DAAAAAAAAAAAA  _

 

_ [softy] thanks for the sound effects bill  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] my pleasure  _

  
  


_                                                               [the loserz club]  _

  
  


_ [eds] hello my name is eddie and i am upset  _

 

_ [trashcan] upsetti spaghetti?  _

 

_ [eds] TIMOTHEE CHALAMET WAS SNUBBED AT THE OSCARS  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] DAMN STRAIGHT WHAT THE FUCK  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] stan not again  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] LAST YEAR HE WAS NOMINATED FOR BEST ACTOR FOR CMBYN BUT THEN NOTHING FOR HIS BEAUTIFUL AND RAW PERFORMANCE AS NIC IN BEAUTIFUL BOY NOT EVEN A NOD  _

 

_ [softy] is this gonna be the golden globes all over again  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] i have somewhat gotten over the globes  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] he just deserved it  _

 

_ [jesus] ive never seen stan more aghast then when timmy lost at the gg _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] when people outside of the iw theater talked shit about star lord  _

 

_ [softy] that was rough  _

 

_ [eds] they were also being assholes in general but yeah that too  _

 

_ [farm boy] they were assholes  _

 

_ [trashcan] gasp mike sweared  _

 

_ [farm boy] i swear all the time  _

 

_ [softy] no  _

 

_ [jesus] youve sweared like three times the entire time ive known you  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] maybe five  _

 

_ [trashcan] the only time ive heard you swear out loud was when one of your goats started eating my coke bottle  _

 

_ [farm boy] still havent forgiven you for that  _

 

_ [trashcan] IT WASNT MY FAULT  _

 

_ [farm boy] do you guys want me to swear more  _

 

_ [jesus] punk mike  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] i cant even imagine punk mike  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] too soft  _

 

_ [eds] no punk has goats  _

 

_ [farm boy] f  _

 

_ [farm boy] fu  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] its okay take your time  _

 

_ [farm boy] fuck  _

 

_ [farm boy] FUCK  _

 

_ [farm boy] FUCK FUCK  _

 

_ [jesus] oh god weve created a monster  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] is what frankenstien felt like when his monster came alive and murdered his brother  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] im so happy u remember that frankenstein was the doctor  _

  
  
  



	42. The Time When Richie Got Airpods

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> man im not personally an ariana stan but 7 rings bops 
> 
> (also velma was hotter)

_  [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [trashcan] I HAVE TRANSCENDED YOU ALL  _

 

_ [trashcan] NOTHING YOU CAN DO WILL EVER BE BETTER THAN ME  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] jesus what did you do  _

 

_ [trashcan] so boris just sent me the christmas present he got me and  _

 

_ [trashcan] ITS AIRPODS  _

 

_ [jesus] jesus  _

 

_ [eds] wow my boyfriend is richer than u  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] if richie shows up to school with airpods i will murder him  _

 

_ [trashcan] sorry i dont speak broke  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] u still owe me 3 bucks from when your card got declined on a condom  _

 

_ [trashcan] i dont speak broke stanis  _

 

_ [softy] your still broke boris is the rich one  _

 

_ [trashcan] ur just jealous  _

 

_ [softy] at least my card didnt get declined on a single condom  _

 

_ [trashcan] OH FUCK YOU GUYS  _

 

_ [trashcan] I FUCKED UP  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] whatd you do now  _

 

_ [trashcan] I PUT ON OF MY AIRPODS UP MY NOSE AND NOW ITS STUCK  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] WHYYYY  _

 

_ [trashcan] CAUSE I WAS GONNA TAUNT GRETA OVER SNAPCHAT AND ITS STUCK NOW  _

 

_ [eds] richie go to the hospital  _

 

_ [jesus] no just blow your nose really hard and itll pop out  _

 

_ [trashcan] im gonna have to go with bevs idea  _

 

_ [trashcan] it makes sense  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] no it doesnt  _

 

_ [farm boy] what are air pods  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] it means hes afraid of broke people _

 

_ [farm boy] wired earbuds  _

 

_ [jesus] STOP IT MIKE YOUR SCARING HIM  _

 

_ [trashcan] i hope your pleased with yourselves  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] very  _

 

_ [softy] how u doing with the air pod up ur nose  _

 

_ [trashcan] i sneezed it out  _

 

_ [eds] was it painful  _

 

_ [trashcan] it was like giving birth cause the sneezing only dislodged it i still had to push it out  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] richie  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] what in the gay fuck  _

 

_ [jesus] wait wait wait you guys  _

 

__ **_jesus has changed trashcan’s name to: trashcant_ **

 

_ [trashcant] ha ha ha very funny  _

  
  


_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [jesus] helllo just your daily reminder that 7 rings is still a bop  _

 

_ [trashcant] bold of you to assume that ariana can make a song that isnt a bop  _

 

_ [eds] god is a woman is still stuck in my head  _

 

_ [farm boy] good. _

 

_ [stanney the manney] the thank u next video really snapped  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] ariana snapped harder than thanos ever could  _

 

_ [eds] pete dont feel so good  _

 

_ [softy] shes coming to boston soon we should go  _

 

_ [trashcant] YES PLEASE  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] I WOULD DIE PLEASE  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] its like a four hour drive  _

 

_ [jesus] ROADTRIP MOTHERFUCKERS  _

 

_ [trashcant] we should watch scooby doo the entire way there  _

 

_ [eds] just so you can make shaggy jokes  _

 

_ [trashcant] no cause daphnes hot  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] nah velma was hotter  _

 

_ [jesus] yeah velma  _

 

_ [softy] imma go daphne  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] and im assuming that bev looking exactly like daphne is a coincidence  _

 

_ [softy] of course  _

 

_ [eds] personally fred was the hottest but go off  _

  
  
  
  
  



	43. The Time Stan Got A Bird

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im having a rough day (as in i feel incapable of love) but i decided to write stan getting a bird to cheer myself up and it half worked

 

_ [the loserz club]  _

 

_ [trashcant] so now that we’ve agreed the best bop is thank u next  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] we never did  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] 7 rings is better  _

 

_ [trashcant] nope false  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] fuck you  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] if i may interject _

 

_ [stanney the manney] bill i love you but you may not  _

 

_ [trashcant] you just like 7 rings cause the ‘you like my hair gee thanks just bought’ it line applies to your aesthetic  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] damn straight  _

 

_ [trashcant] thank u next is just superior  _

 

_ [trashcant] i mean the music video  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] did you even see the 7 rings vid  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] im gay and in a relationship but id go straight for ariana  _

 

_ [softy] personally i prefer aint got no tears left to cry  _

 

_ [trashcant] THIS ISNT ABOUT YOU BEN  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] i dont blame u stan  _

 

_ [trashcant] THE THANK U NEXT VID HAD TROYE  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] this is about ariana not troye  _

 

_ [eds] babe im sorry but  _

 

_ [eds] 7 rings  _

 

_ [trashcant] GASP MY EDS  _

 

_ [trashcant] HOW COULD U  _

 

_ [farm boy] i know how to settle this _

 

_ [farm boy] ask boris  _

 

_ [trashcant] ive texted him  _

 

_ [trashcant] hes responding  _

 

_ [trashcant] 7 колец ублюдка _

 

_ [jesus] 7 rings bastard  _

 

_ [trashcant] DAMN MY CUZ TOO  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] try the other one  _

 

_ [trashcant] hes responding  _

 

_ [trashcant] DAMNIT MIKES 7 RINGS TOO  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] ha ha i have converted your entire extended family  _

 

_ [trashcant] u played me like a fiddle  _

 

_ [stanney the manney] no i played you like the cheap kazoo you are  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] damnnnnnnnnn  _

  
  
  


_ [my love - beautiful boy]  _

 

_ [my love] do you remember that one time before we were dating we went to the quarry for some reason  _

 

_ [my love] and i started staring off in the distance and then i look back and YOU HAD A FUCKING BIRD PERCHED ON YOUR FINGER AND YOUR PETTING IT WITH YOUR  OTHER HAND LIKE FUCKING SNOW WHITE  _

 

_ [my love] MEANWHILE IM OVER HERE TRYING NOT TO SCARE THE BIRD BUT LIKE YOUVE NEVER LOOKED SO PRETTY SO THIS IS A LARGE SEGWAY INTO  _

 

_ [my love]  i bought u a bird  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] KJSDNSFK;DJALJL;JFLAGLKHADL;KH _

 

_ [beautiful boy] OMFG WHAT TYPE  _

 

_ [my love] green cheeked parakeet  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] THATS THE ONE I WANTED  _

 

_ [my love] i know i talked to your parents  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] ahhhhhhhhhh bill  _

 

_ [my love] i got u one of those fancy cages too that he can climb on and a bunch of toys and things  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] I LOVE YOU SO MUCH  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] I FEEL LIKE I DONT TELL U THAT ENOUGH  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] BILLIAM DENBROUGH I LOVE YOU  _

 

_ [my love] and stanley uris i love you  _

 

_ [my love] what are you  gonna call him  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] hmmm _

 

_ [beautiful boy] apollo  _

 

_ [my love] very fitting  _

 

_ [my love] but once you meet this bird promise me you wont forget about me  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] i could never  _

 

_ [my love] im on my way to your house rn with apollo  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] ahhhhhhhhhhh  _

  
  
  
  



	44. The Time When It Was Valentine's Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy v day heres to another year of being painfully alone

_ [chee<3 - eds<3]  _

 

_ [chee<3] wanna hang out on saturday  _

 

_ [eds<3] cant im hanging with nathan  _

 

_ [chee<3] whos nathan  _

 

_ [eds<3] hes on the track team with me  _

 

_ [eds<3] i was gonna show him around town  _

  
  


_ [dumbass - bitchie bill]  _

 

_ [dumbass] tell me everything u know about a nathan  _

 

_ [dumbass] hes new in town and hes on the track team  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] hes from castle rock  _

 

_ [dumbass] is he gay  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] idk why _

 

_ [dumbass] hes coming for my lover  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] god why do you phrase things like that  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] and how do u know  _

 

_ [dumbass] hes hanging with eds on saturday  _

 

_ [bitchie bill] seems normal  _

 

_ [dumbass] we’ll see….. _

 

__

_                   [the loserz club]  _

  
  


_ [bord boy] thank u next is my favorite album now  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] uh tea  _

 

_ [farm boy] ive had it on repeat for the past 3 days  _

 

_ [eds] me too  _

 

_ [bord boy] apollo really like break up with your gf cause im bored  _

 

_ [trashcant] aww he listens  _

 

_ [bord boy]  _ **_[apollodancingtobreakupwithyourgf.movie]_ **

 

_ [farm boy] everyone say thank u bill for giving stan this bird  _

 

_ [jesus] thank u  _

 

_ [softy] next  _

 

_ [trashcant] IM SO FUCKING GRATEFUL FOR MY EX  _

 

_ [softy] the group that sings thank u next together stays together _

 

_ [eds] bloodline really gave me the best thing it say to my homophobic ass of a mother and ill never be able to thank ariana enough for that  _

 

_ [softy] im now able to say next everytime someone tells me thank u  _

 

_ [bill nye the science guy] valentines day is coming up and i would kill for the vinyl album  _

 

_ [bord boy] ur wish is my command _

 

_ [trashcant] did that sound kinky to anyone else or just me  _

 

_ [farm boy] just u  _

  
  


_ [chee<3 - eds<3]  _

 

_ [chee<3] happy v day my sweet eds _

 

_ [eds<3] happy valentines day chee chee  _

 

_ [chee<3] ill meet u behind school and give u your gift  _

 

_ [eds<3] see you there bby  _

  
  
  


_ [beautiful boy - my love]  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] we’re still on for dinner right  _

 

_ [my love] u know it babe  _

 

_ [beautiful boy] see u in english  _

 

_ [my love] see ya  _

 

 

_ [beautiful boy] and there may be a certian vinyl album present for dinner  _

__

_ [my love] YOU DIDNT  _

__

_ [beautiful boy] :)  _

__

_          [benny babe - bevvie] _

 

_ [benny babe] when u get to school check ur locker _

 

_ [bevvie] y  _

 

_ [benny babe] there may or may not be a love poem in ur locker from yours truly  _

 

_ [bevvie] awww babe check ur locker i spent 50 bucks on chocolate  _

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Feedback is always appreciated
> 
> and if you have any requests for fun bits for this comment them please!


End file.
